[Mr_Burns]

I was hoping they would show the post-game handshakes longer so I could see Titus work his magic, but ESPN changed games too quickly.

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I?ve noticed in my two and a half years of college basketball that nothing demonstrates the caste system on a basketball team quite like the post game handshakes with the opposition. In case you don?t quite follow, consider this. The only people that are allowed to do anything other than slap hands with the opposing players are the star players for each team. The star players always go through and do that handshake that looks like they are about to thumb-wrestle, followed by the leaning into each other to touch shoulders and then wrapping their arm that isn?t involved in the handshake around one another. If you still don?t know what I?m talking about, watch the post-game handshakes after any college basketball game and prepare to be blown away.

People like me who didn?t play or had very little to do with the game are nothing more than a stepping stone to that big embrace with Evan Turner at the end of the line. I plan on changing that. Starting tonight with our game against Purdue, I plan on going through the line and making it awkward times ten for everyone I shake hands with. I am going to do the regular handshake, but hold it for a moment too long while I do that one arm wrap around thing that the superstars always do. I will keep track of how many people give me the one arm embrace in return. If the player I am shaking hands with thinks ?Who does this guy think he is?? then I have successfully done my job. Hopefully I can average at least one a game, but I honestly have no idea what to expect. I?m just anxious for the inordinate amount of respect I will undoubtedly get.