Notre Dame SOS, history, Charlie's weight, opinions (not football)

[Buckin Crazy]

"I really, really hate Notre Dame

I hate the campus. It's not that pretty. The roads are pavement. The buildings are brick. Last I heard the candles in the grotto were made of wax. The way they talk about it, I expected rivers of chocolate, trees made of cinnamon sticks growing candied apples picked by singing Tahitian dwarves enslaved by a tall guy with good teeth and a tall hat.

I hate the students. All 4,000 of them show up to the game in the same stupid green t-shirt that bears the photos of the Four Horsemen and says "RETURN TO THAT TIME BEFORE I WAS ALIVE WHEN WINNING EIGHT GAMES WAS CAUSE FOR MASS CONSUMPTION OF INDUSTRIAL STRENGTH DRAIN CLEANER" or some crap like that. I hate the fact that the girls yell "Go Irish!" in such an ear-piercing tones it makes me wish my ears were equipped with a high-pitch band reject filter. I hate the fact that 75% of them couldn't name the starting five on the men's basketball team, but they can tell you the helmet size of their true freshman backup gunner on the scout team's punt coverage unit.

I hate their fans. I hate when they say "I'm from Bangladesh, so I like Notre Dame" or "My dog's previous owner was Catholic, so I like Notre Dame". I hate the fact that they haven't won a national championship since before most of them were catheterized, yet they continue to bring it up even after you just waxed them 41-16 on their home field. I hate the fact that they cried during Rudy. There are stories occurring every day at deaf high schools around the country better than Rudy, yet we have to watch a long-winded movie about a Bangledeshi midget with the foot speed of a heavily sedated three-legged yak whose dog's previous owner was Catholic and so he grew up wearing a Notre Dame letter jacket, talked to an old bald guy and had his dorky friends chant his name so he could get playing time against the Angry Lepers of Southwestern Nebraska School of Appendectomy Surgery and Haiku Poetry.

I hate their stadium. It's nothing special. It seats 80,000. It didn't wake up any echoes when I walked in. Wrigley Field gives me goose bumps. Notre Dame Stadium gives me sneezing fits. I hate the bloody leprechaun that prances the sidelines like a PennState flag boy wearing capri pants. I want to back over him with the Special. I'd like to beat his head against the World's Largest Drum. I hate the tailgating scene at ND. I've seen shorter lines for Port-A-Lets at Kid Rock concerts. I've seen better spreads tailgating at IU and Northwestern.

I hate NBC. I hate Sunday Night Football on NBC. I hate John Madden for being on NBC. I hate 2:30 kickoffs. Play at noon or 3:30 like everyone else. I hate the fact that my cable company doesn't even carry NBCHD.

I hate Charlie Weis. He's arrogant and overrated. I'm sorry, but when your team lays an egg at home against the first truly good team they play, you're not Yoda. When MichiganState is pasting you before John L. Smith pulls a John L. Smith and hands you the game, you're not even Jabba. Jabba had Carrie Fisher in a bikini and chains. Weis couldn't get Rosie O'Donnell in spandex. I hate how those window-licking morons in South Bend anointed him after one good season and completely forgot the fact that Ty started out pretty hot too. I hate the fact that his profile from his forehead to his gut is a straight line. I hate the fact that he's taller lying down than he is standing up. I hate the fact that his offensive line rolls him out of the tunnel and onto the sideline like that fat kid from Hook.

I hate Lou Holtz, the commentator, and how even though he coached at other schools afterward, he still jocks ND. I hate Lou Holtz, the coach, for going into Purdue's locker room after pummeling us in the 80's and telling Lani Paleli that if he wanted to come to Notre Dame, he would still take him (even though he played for Purdue). I hate Lou Holtz, the old wrinkly author and his "motivational speeches". I hate that he seems drunker than Harry Caray (rest his soul!) at 9pm during a day-night double-header when he's stone cold sober.

I hate all the talk about their schedule. They wouldn't be that great in the Big 10 and they know it. They would be like PennState: just another good team. They would struggle to play their Big 10 teams, USC and still squeeze in all the service academies and retirement center rec squads they manage to eke on to their schedule so they can be bowl-eligible every year. I hate the fact that even though their schedule is no harder than any SEC, ACC or Big 10 team plays year in year out, we have to hear about how hard it is to play Michigan, Purdue, Michigan State and USC EVERY STINKING YEAR!!!!!!!!! Never mind MOST Big 10 teams play Michigan, Michigan State, Ohio State, Penn State, Purdue, Wisconsin, and Iowa week in, week out, without benefit of scheduling them as they see fit.
I really, really hate Notre Dame, but that's just me."

[daddyphatsacs]

Thanks Troy. I'd figure that you'd enjoy Notre Dame, given the heisman springboard that they provided you in the Fiesta bowl last year.

[DaddyBigBucks]

Ohio State's relationship with Notre Dame is not that complicated. Especially the relationship of ND to Buckeye Fans at BP.

Judging from the quality of the posting here, my best guess is that the average age on this board is about 15 years older than the average age on other Buckeye boards that I will not name. I am not trying to be funny. I am serious, and I think I am being kind.

What make that relevant is that the overwhelming majority of the fans here remember decades during which the MULTITUDE of ND fans that live amongst us were dismissive and condescending. They are only that way about their delusions of being the "only clean program in Div. IA" right now. They are no longer dismissive and condescending with respect to football prowess. Not compared to the 80's.

Many, if not most of us here were old enough at the time to remember the days in the 80s when the 95-96? series was scheduled. ND fans at the time literally sniffed at us with contempt and asked, "Why would you schedule us. You're nowhere near our level. It's suicide."

You don't deal with that for as long as we did without harboring resentment of a kind. For most of us, the outcome of the mid-90s series salved that wound. For most of the rest, a recent bowl game scratched the residual itch.

All that's left really is just enough morbid curiosity that when the same old ND hubris raises its head we sit up and take notice. The trash-talking that preceded the beat-down last January was a carnival side-show. The complaining about the Irish of all teams getting jobbed by the polls is nothing short of stand-up comedy. At this point, we're just having fun.

We know that these things run in cycles and that Jim Tressel won't live forever. But we'll never be talked-down to again.


And oh by the way, yes I have heard an ND fan say that they were the only clean program in Div. IA.

I thought you'd get a kick out of that one.


EDIT: In case you're wondering, I was typing my response when Mili posted what appears directly above it. His post proves my point and vice versa.

[smith403]

Originally Posted by DaddyBigBucks

Ohio State's relationship with Notre Dame is not that complicated. Especially the relationship of ND to Buckeye Fans at BP.

Judging from the quality of the posting here, my best guess is that the average age on this board is about 15 years older than the average age on other Buckeye boards that I will not name. I am not trying to be funny. I am serious, and I think I am being kind.

What make that relevant is that the overwhelming majority of the fans here remember decades during which the MULTITUDE of ND fans that live amongst us were dismissive and condescending. They are only that way about their delusions of being the "only clean program in Div. IA" right now. They are no longer dismissive and condescending with respect to football prowess. Not compared to the 80's.

Many, if not most of us here were old enough at the time to remember the days in the 80s when the 95-96? series was scheduled. ND fans at the time literally sniffed at us with contempt and asked, "Why would you schedule us. You're nowhere near our level. It's suicide."

You don't deal with that for as long as we did without harboring resentment of a kind. For most of us, the outcome of the mid-90s series salved that wound. For most of the rest, a recent bowl game scratched the residual itch.

All that's left really is just enough morbid curiosity that when the same old ND hubris raises its head we sit up and take notice. The trash-talking that preceded the beat-down last January was a carnival side-show. The complaining about the Irish of all teams getting jobbed by the polls is nothing short of stand-up comedy. At this point, we're just having fun.

We know that these things run in cycles and that Jim Tressel won't live forever. But we'll never be talked-down to again.


And oh by the way, yes I have heard an ND fan say that they were the only clean program in Div. IA.

I thought you'd get a kick out of that one.

Well said...I am one of those older posters...also one who knows they got their good or "name" coaches from Ohio and mainly Miami and Ohio State...I listened to their holier than thou crap for over 30 years and have thoroughly enjoyed the 2 games in the 90's and the total dominance of the Buckeyes in the Fiesta Bowl...I HATE DOMERS

[BuckeyeFan_InTx]

Did anyone see th 60 minutes on coach weiss?

[buckiprof]

Originally Posted by DaddyBigBucks

Ohio State's relationship with Notre Dame is not that complicated. Especially the relationship of ND to Buckeye Fans at BP.

Judging from the quality of the posting here, my best guess is that the average age on this board is about 15 years older than the average age on other Buckeye boards that I will not name. I am not trying to be funny. I am serious, and I think I am being kind.

What make that relevant is that the overwhelming majority of the fans here remember decades during which the MULTITUDE of ND fans that live amongst us were dismissive and condescending. They are only that way about their delusions of being the "only clean program in Div. IA" right now. They are no longer dismissive and condescending with respect to football prowess. Not compared to the 80's.

Many, if not most of us here were old enough at the time to remember the days in the 80s when the 95-96? series was scheduled. ND fans at the time literally sniffed at us with contempt and asked, "Why would you schedule us. You're nowhere near our level. It's suicide."

You don't deal with that for as long as we did without harboring resentment of a kind. For most of us, the outcome of the mid-90s series salved that wound. For most of the rest, a recent bowl game scratched the residual itch.

All that's left really is just enough morbid curiosity that when the same old ND hubris raises its head we sit up and take notice. The trash-talking that preceded the beat-down last January was a carnival side-show. The complaining about the Irish of all teams getting jobbed by the polls is nothing short of stand-up comedy. At this point, we're just having fun.

We know that these things run in cycles and that Jim Tressel won't live forever. But we'll never be talked-down to again.


And oh by the way, yes I have heard an ND fan say that they were the only clean program in Div. IA.

I thought you'd get a kick out of that one.


EDIT: In case you're wondering, I was typing my response when Mili posted what appears directly above it. His post proves my point and vice versa.

I am one of those older posters who remembers the ND [censored] in the '80's. I remember an ND fan mandating that I need to cheer for ND over Miami because Miami cheats and ND is a clean program. (I informed him I cheer for neither since at the time I disliked both programs. Now I hate no other program like ND.)

I remember when scheduling ND in 95-96 was "poohed-poohed" by some ND fans I know. I also remember sitting in South Stands during the '95 game, next to some [censored]ing ND fans. Listening to their [censored] in the 1st half, watching them pull out their [censored]ing rosary beads when ND lined up for a field goal, their unparalled arrogance and contempt for OSU, their belief that OSU was fortunate to be on the same field as ND, their complete lack of basic football knowledge, everything about them, validated my intense hatred for all things ND. Yes, that win, that ass-whupping laid on them, was an especially sweet victory for me.

For all the [censored] I have heard from their fans, for all the [censored] we all have to put up with from the media pertaining to ND, for each new coach who comes aboard and will "Return to Glory" the football program, I will always simply say [censored] ND. [censored] Knute Rockne, [censored] the Four Horsemen, [censored] the golden dome, [censored] the grotto, [censored] Rudy, [censored] the Gipper, [censored] Charlie "Snotglaze" Weis, simply [censored] them.

[LordJeffBuck]

In the mid-90's, I thought that the wins against Notre Dame were two of the greatest and most important in Buckeye history. However, in retrospect, I realize that those victories were no more important than beating, say, Washington State, or Missouri, or any other reasonably competent non-conference program. Those two OSU-ND games (and many