| College Football The place to talk about college football teams other than Ohio State |
07-01-2008, 04:25 PM
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fearthevest
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Apologies if this has been posted before. I'm sure it will still get a laugh the second time, though. Found it on bleacherreport.com.
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Southeastern Conference football is often regarded as one of the most competitive, and rivalry-rich, conferences in America.
As a Tennessee alumnus who has watched every team on this list play at least once, I can tell you that there are few things quite like the passion displayed in SEC rivalries.
If you don't know that much about the teams in the SEC, but you're a history buff like I am, this rundown of SEC teams as Middle Eastern countries may help you better understand the SEC...
(note: my apologies for not making it known up front that this is one of those forwarded-multiple-times jokes I received via email. For the life of me I've been unable to find who originally wrote it. I had it in my first draft of this post to state that...and deleted it in my giddy rush to publish it. Nonetheless, it's sheer brilliance...certainly not from my head)
ALABAMA: Saudi Arabia
Once a proud kingdom, torn up by fighting and surrounded by Iran and Iraq (see below), with an a$ in Al-Qaeda hell bent on bringing them down.
LSU: Iran
Current superpower in the region but it will all come crashing down because they have a highly functioning retard as a leader.
TENNESSEE: Iraq
Got a bunch of history but the country as a whole is going in the tank and they will kill themselves off before it's all over.
FLORIDA: Syria
Evil douchebags who will stoop to whatever level they need to win. No real history to speak of but thinks they are the cradle of civilization.
GEORGIA: Kuwait
Tons of riches and unrealized potential, but still vulnerable to Iraq.
AUBURN: Al Qaeda
No country, just a movement of disgruntled fanatics who live to blow up those who are more fortunate. No other goal in life than to bring down the House of Saudi Arabia. Terrorizing the Arabians for six years is the crowning achievement in their history. Signing day was a major setback to the movement. They'll be looking for a new leader soon.
ARKANSAS: Palestinian territories
No one really cares or worries about them unless they can be of some use (i.e. winning a battle once in a while against Iran that causes a bit of shake up in rankings)
MISSISSIPPI STATE: Qatar
Where the hell is Qatar?
OLE MISS: Afghanistan
Not much going for it, but hot women.
VANDERBILT: Israel
Just leave them alone for God's sake. What did they ever do to you?
KENTUCKY: Morocco
Not really part of the Middle East. Has other things to do than fight (or play football)
SOUTH CAROLINA: Libya
Has a charismatic leader in a land of nothingness. Will rattle his word but knows he doesn't have a whole hell of a lot to back it up with.
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__________________
"The defense wins the upsets."
- Wayne Woodrow Hayes, Full Professor, The Ohio State University
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07-01-2008, 04:55 PM
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[censored] M*ch*gan, it's no shave november!!!!11!1!!
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__________________
"See to it that your head is up, If not just remember this, Just never let your chest and your chin touch in public,Those that stand against us would love this, Man [censored] them" -"The Puzzle," on The Undisputed Truth, by Brother Ali.
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07-01-2008, 04:59 PM
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Unemployed Super Hero
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Buckeneye
why on earth would you spend 3 days in hell just to shoot the breeze?
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well, I had to pass through Auburn to get to Atlanta.
__________________
"I would rather a daughter in a whorehouse than a son at Auburn"
If Auburn was playing Satan's Army, I'd probably pull for the Prince of Darkness.
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07-01-2008, 05:06 PM
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[censored] M*ch*gan, it's no shave november!!!!11!1!!
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Join Date: Jan 2008
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nutriaitch
well, I had to pass through Auburn to get to Atlanta.
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Welcome to the neighborhood.
__________________
"See to it that your head is up, If not just remember this, Just never let your chest and your chin touch in public,Those that stand against us would love this, Man [censored] them" -"The Puzzle," on The Undisputed Truth, by Brother Ali.
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07-01-2008, 05:07 PM
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Grey Beard = True Buckeye
Moderator
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nutriaitch
well, I had to pass through Auburn to get to Atlanta.
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Or you could stay on I-10 a little longer before turning north.
But then you'd have to pass through Tallahassee. Good call going through Auburn instead. |
07-01-2008, 06:12 PM
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Unemployed Super Hero
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DaddyBigBucks
Or you could stay on I-10 a little longer before turning north.
But then you'd have to pass through Tallahassee. Good call going through Auburn instead.
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That's like asking if I'd rather eat horse [censored] or cow [censored].
__________________
"I would rather a daughter in a whorehouse than a son at Auburn"
If Auburn was playing Satan's Army, I'd probably pull for the Prince of Darkness.
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07-02-2008, 11:19 AM
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fearthevest
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I guess this would be the most appropriate place to post this. From thewizardofodds.com.
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If you've ever wondered what the key ingredients are in making a perfect cupcake schedule, ask a fan from Minnesota, the Southeastern or Big 12 conferences
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The Wizard of Odds: Art of the Cupcake Schedule
__________________
"The defense wins the upsets."
- Wayne Woodrow Hayes, Full Professor, The Ohio State University
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