2008 SEC Discussion

[generaladm]

Apologies if this has been posted before. I'm sure it will still get a laugh the second time, though. Found it on bleacherreport.com.

Southeastern Conference football is often regarded as one of the most competitive, and rivalry-rich, conferences in America.
As a Tennessee alumnus who has watched every team on this list play at least once, I can tell you that there are few things quite like the passion displayed in SEC rivalries.
If you don't know that much about the teams in the SEC, but you're a history buff like I am, this rundown of SEC teams as Middle Eastern countries may help you better understand the SEC...
(note: my apologies for not making it known up front that this is one of those forwarded-multiple-times jokes I received via email. For the life of me I've been unable to find who originally wrote it. I had it in my first draft of this post to state that...and deleted it in my giddy rush to publish it. Nonetheless, it's sheer brilliance...certainly not from my head)
ALABAMA: Saudi Arabia
Once a proud kingdom, torn up by fighting and surrounded by Iran and Iraq (see below), with an a$ in Al-Qaeda hell bent on bringing them down.

LSU: Iran
Current superpower in the region but it will all come crashing down because they have a highly functioning retard as a leader.

TENNESSEE: Iraq
Got a bunch of history but the country as a whole is going in the tank and they will kill themselves off before it's all over.

FLORIDA: Syria
Evil douchebags who will stoop to whatever level they need to win. No real history to speak of but thinks they are the cradle of civilization.

GEORGIA: Kuwait
Tons of riches and unrealized potential, but still vulnerable to Iraq.

AUBURN: Al Qaeda
No country, just a movement of disgruntled fanatics who live to blow up those who are more fortunate. No other goal in life than to bring down the House of Saudi Arabia. Terrorizing the Arabians for six years is the crowning achievement in their history. Signing day was a major setback to the movement. They'll be looking for a new leader soon.

ARKANSAS: Palestinian territories
No one really cares or worries about them unless they can be of some use (i.e. winning a battle once in a while against Iran that causes a bit of shake up in rankings)

MISSISSIPPI STATE: Qatar
Where the hell is Qatar?

OLE MISS: Afghanistan
Not much going for it, but hot women.

VANDERBILT: Israel
Just leave them alone for God's sake. What did they ever do to you?

KENTUCKY: Morocco
Not really part of the Middle East. Has other things to do than fight (or play football)

SOUTH CAROLINA: Libya
Has a charismatic leader in a land of nothingness. Will rattle his word but knows he doesn't have a whole hell of a lot to back it up with.

[jmorbitz]

Originally Posted by brodybuck21

I'm ready to phucking shoot myself if September doesn't get here SOON!!!

[Nutriaitch]

Originally Posted by Buckeneye

why on earth would you spend 3 days in hell just to shoot the breeze?

well, I had to pass through Auburn to get to Atlanta.

[jmorbitz]

Originally Posted by Nutriaitch

well, I had to pass through Auburn to get to Atlanta.

Welcome to the neighborhood.

[DaddyBigBucks]

Originally Posted by Nutriaitch

well, I had to pass through Auburn to get to Atlanta.

Or you could stay on I-10 a little longer before turning north.

But then you'd have to pass through Tallahassee. Good call going through Auburn instead.

[Nutriaitch]

Originally Posted by DaddyBigBucks

Or you could stay on I-10 a little longer before turning north.

But then you'd have to pass through Tallahassee. Good call going through Auburn instead.

That's like asking if I'd rather eat horse [censored] or cow [censored].

[generaladm]

I guess this would be the most appropriate place to post this. From thewizardofodds.com.

If you've ever wondered what the key ingredients are in making a perfect cupcake schedule, ask a fan from Minnesota, the Southeastern or Big 12 conferences

The Wizard of Odds: Art of the Cupcake Schedule

[Gatorubet]

[generaladm]

The SEC group love fest just got more ridiculous. Link from www.thewizardofodds.com

The Memphis real estate company creating Birmingham's entertainment district wants to build a tourist attraction devoted to the Southeastern Conference. The venue would include a merchandise store, restaurant and catering services and an interactive history of the SEC.
John Elkington, CEO of Performa Entertainment Real Estate Inc., met again Wednesday with SEC officials to discuss the concept. He plans to make a formal proposal with drawings later this month in hope of opening the venue in 2009.

Birmingham entertainment district eyes Southeastern Conference tourist lure- al.com

[sepia5]

Originally Posted by generaladm

The SEC group love fest just got more ridiculous. Link from www.thewizardofodds.com



Birmingham entertainment district eyes Southeastern Conference tourist lure- al.com

I hope they have a "Golden Age of Segregation" room. I suspect this will be a "selective-history" project.

[Jaxbuck]

Originally Posted by sepia5

I hope they have a "Golden Age of Segregation" room. I suspect this will be a "selective-history" project.

They should put it next to the NCAA major infraction room.



SEC No. 2 for most NCAA infractions

[sepia5]

Originally Posted by Jaxbuck

They should put it next to the NCAA major infraction room.



SEC No. 2 for most NCAA infractions

From that article:

"I think there's more competition in the SEC for recruits than any other league," Luginbill said. "Alabama, Auburn, LSU, Florida, Georgia ... they're all competing for the same guys. Plus, other schools are sneaking in and snagging players.

"Add to that, the ACC is next door. Look at schools in the Big Ten, the Big 12 and the Pac-10. You don't have the same competition year after year. The geography is different. So is the talent base. In the SEC, the competition for players is cut-throat."

That's true, Tommy. We here in the Midwest don't have the same talent base as in the South. We know definitively, because your rankings say so.

['BusNative]

I didn't know the SEC had standards, but...

SEC to lower admission standards : Fanblogs College Football Blog

July 1, 2008

SEC to lower admission standards


Senator Blutarsky brings word that the SEC has lowered its admission standards to match the NCAA minimum and will allow member schools to begin admitting non-qualifiers on a case-by-case basis.

At its most recent meetings in Destin, Fla., the SEC apparently relaxed its rules concerning non-qualifiers. I was in Destin but missed that development, as did most of the other reporters there, none of whom (at least as far as I have seen in extensive on-line searching) mentioned it at the time. It's only been referenced in stories about Powe. But here is what Ole Miss athletics director Pete Boone had to say about the change. 'Basically, the SEC's initial eligibility rules will generally mirror the NCAA's, which allow some non-qualifiers to attend school and try to get their grades up before competing,' Boone told the Clarion-Ledger. 'The one caveat is that any non-qualifier still has to be approved by the (SEC) commissioner.'

...

It is a huge change in the way the conference approaches this issue. In the past, the SEC ?€” unlike other leagues ?€” didn't allow non-qualifiers on campus at all, at least as prospective athletes. A non-qualifier either had to get qualified in prep school or graduate from junior college. Otherwise, they didn't get on the field, ever.

So what brought about this historic change? Hark back to last October when Alabama head coach Nick Saban accused South Florida of stocking its team with players that didn't qualify under the SEC guidelines.

"The distribution of players is not the same for everybody," said Alabama head coach Nick Saban. "There's a significant amount of players who don't qualify (at some schools) and they end up being pretty good players at some other schools. I think there are six guys starting on South Florida's defense who probably could have gone to Florida or Florida State but Florida and Florida State couldn't take them. And if you do a good job of recruiting that way ..." Saban stopped there, but the implication is obvious: If you recruit that way you get players that are good enough to elevate a program in a hurry.

And there you have it... yet another recruiting change brought about by Nick Saban. (See also, "the Saban Rule")
So... now the SEC will be on a "level" playing field with most of the other conferences. Of course, the big winners from this change are going to be the bottom and mid-level SEC teams, who were losing recruits to other conferences (notably the Big East, C-USA, and MAC) because of the SEC's insistence on higher academic standards.
Sly Croom, Rich Brooks, and Houston Nutt owe Saban a cigar, I suspect.

The other fascinating part of this change is the new commandant role for the SEC commissioner.
So... you're telling me that if a team wants to admit a non-qualifier they have to saunter up to the SEC Head Cheese and make their case? Heh. As if the SEC honcho job wasn't political enough already.
I'm just waiting for the first time the SEC commish says "no" to Kentucy/Tennessee/Vandy/Georgia/Florida/South Carolina/Alabama/Auburn/LSU/Arkansas/Ole Miss/Mississippi State after saying "yes" to Kentucy/Tennessee/Vandy/Georgia/Florida/South Carolina/Alabama/Auburn/LSU/Arkansas/Ole Miss/Mississippi State.

[jwinslow]

Yes, nobody struggles more with high admission standards than the SEC, Slick Nick

[Gatorubet]

Originally Posted by jwinslow

Yes, nobody struggles more with high admission standards than the SEC, Slick Nick

Are you suggesting that the Big-10 recruits to higher admissions standards than the SEC prior to the purported change? Stats? Link?

I mean, I only know UF and our standards, and I know that we have turned down players that met both NCAA and SEC standards. Regardless, I was not aware that your conference held a disadvantage in recruiting based upon academic standards.

Speed we know about.