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Advice for your daughters

Rules for dating my daughter

1. You will come to my door and wait for me to answer it
2. You will then come in and enjoy polite conversation with me
3. After that we will have a meal at my table
4. Next we will retire to my livingroom where we will enjoy a movie of my chosing, most likely a Disney movie. If I like you, you will be permited to sit next to her. I will be watching you so no funny business
5. After the movie if I still like you (highly unlikely) you will be allowed to walk with my daughter to the door and sy good bye after shaking her hands.
6. I don't own a gun, I own many guns. I grew up with a gun in my hands.
7. If you expect to get anything off of my daughter remember, family comes first
 
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Donnyjr said:
7. If you expect to get anything off of my daughter remember, family comes first

So your sticking him with sloppy seconds?

and does this mean her little brother gets to go before the date??

Whatever happened to "guests first"?


I can't believe of this group I am the first one to think of this... :shake:
 
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When a coworker of mine found out I had a daughter, he said "Too bad"

He clarified later:

When you have a son, you only have to worry about one dick. When you have a daughter, you have to worry about every dick in the county.
 
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BuckWrestler141 said:
Haha, you all claim this yet, i've never dated a girl with a psycho dad.

I'd love to hear some stories about yhose of you who did meet 'shotgun dad' though because i assumed it was a myth. Your daughter would kill you.

I tend to agree with 141... I've never really encountered the shotgun Dad.. though I did date a girl for like 6 months and never met her parents... I suspect this was the reason.

I've only ever heard 2 legit "shotgun" dad stories-- with actual guns-- the forst time I was there and the dudeevidently made it a habit to show this guy's daughter's boyfriend's his entire-- extensive- gun collection. (And by extensive, the guys brother in law owns the Fin Fur and Feather, which is a Cabela's size outfitter off 71)... I think he was jsut fucking with the kids for fun... I was friends with his son... and I thought it was funny.... this other dude trying to take the girl out... not so much.

The second one was one of my best friend going to pick up a girl with the dad cleaning his .44 Magnum and raking the kid over the coals. It seemed pretty out there at the time... but the guy has a wife and three daughters in the house... all... smoking-fucking-hot... so hot that the middle one got her Senior Pictures for free in exchange for the photographer to be allowed to make a poster size shot of her portrait for the centerpeice of his showroom.... so I guess don't balme the dude... you know what they say "guard your girl(s)"
 
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While in High School I brought a girl over that I just started dating to meet my parents. That night when I took her home and came back to my house my father told me that if I did anything to hurt that girl he would cut my nuts off. I have very good parents that taught me to show respect to your date and her parents. I have 3 sons, every girl they date will have the same respect as if it were my daughter. There will be no need for any shotgun type crap with my kids because they will get the shit kicked out of them at home for disrespectful behavior.

Oh, that girl I brought over is the mother of my 3 sons and we've been married 11+ years. I've still got my nuts but some sick doctor did some cutting, burning and slicing down there....no chance of having a daughter now.
 
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More advice....

It's supposedly an excerpt from the book "Dumbing Down our Kids" by educator Charles Sykes, and it is very good - so here it is.

Rule 1: Life is not fair - get used to it!

Rule 2: The world doesn't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3: You will not make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone
until you earn both.

Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.

Rule 6: If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault , so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

:biggrin:
 
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