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"Codeword For Sex"

Discussion in 'Open Discussion (Work-safe)' started by CCI, Feb 26, 2005.

  1. CCI

    CCI Metal Rules

    A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code" to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting their children in on it. They decided on the word Typewriter.

    One day the husband told his five year old daughter, "Go tell your mommy that daddy needs to type a letter".

    The child told her mother what her dad said, and her mom responded, "Tell your daddy that he can't type a letter right now cause there is a red ribbon in the typewriter." The child went back to tell her father what mommy said.

    A few days later the mom told the daughter, "Tell daddy that he can type that letter now."

    The child told her father, returned to her mother and announced, "Daddy said never mind with the typewriter, he already wrote the letter by hand."
     
  2. What the heck that was a few days ago this Daddy wants to type many letters a day......

    GOOD ONE
     
  3. Oh8ch

    Oh8ch Cognoscente of Omphaloskepsis Staff Member

    Brings to mind a couple of similar ones -

    1. Young mother is speaking with the visiting Pastor when her 3 YO runs into the room holding his crotch and yelling "Mommy, I got to pee, I got to pee!".

    The woman is mortified and tells her son later that it isn't polite to say "pee" in front of other people. Instead he should say he has to "whisper".

    Next day Dad is napping on the couch and the boy runs into the room. "Daddy, I got to whisper, I got to whisper."

    Dad say "OK son, whisper in my ear".

    2. A farmer has just hired a prize bull to impregnate his two cows - a brown cow and a white cow.

    While he is waiating for the bull to perform his service the Pastor pulls up to visit. The farmer takes him in the house to chat and asks his young son to let him know when the bull is done.

    Twenty minutes later the boy runs into the hourse and yells "Daddy, the bull just f****d the brown cow!"

    Dad is mortified and calls his son aside telling him that f**k is not at all an appropriate word to use in front of the Pastor and that instead he should say that the bull has "surprised" the cow.

    The boy leaves only to return 10 minutes later yelling "Daddy, Daddy..."

    His Dad cuts him off by saying "I know son, the bull just 'surprised' the white cow".

    "He sure did" says the boy, "He just f****d the brown one again."
     

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