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gbearbuck said:
You would be surprise at how narrowly focused many relationships are... once two live together, are a single financial unit, and have to deal with each other day in day out.... a lot of feelings can change quickly in regards to ones spouse (if a lot of the "bad/noncompatible" issues come to light for the first time under "heated" conversation).
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That's why (even though we got lectured for it) we decided to live together. Like an internship if you will. Ironed a lot of that stuff out on the practice field.
 
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We did the same... kind of... basically lived together our last year in undergrad (although she technically had her own place, as I had mine... two nights throughout the year, we were not together when we fell asleep).

Good practice, however different when "there is no way out" after the "I do's are said"... You'll be fine, the first year tends to be one of the toughest as both adjust to the other. Children, finances, and life goals tend to be the three major topics stated to cause divorse.

You would be surprised to find out the number of soon to be retired couples that love each other... lived the bulk of their lives with each other, raised kids together, gone through the good and bad parts of life, that get a divorse right before/after retirement... the reason? One wanted to do one thing, the other wanted to do another thing at retirement... and both wanted to do their thing for the bulk of their life. Also, both though the other was in agreement. Truth was, neither talked about it until the time came up... funny how a brief conversation many years ago would have solved this "issue/problem"... I've seen two couples that were best friends get a divorse and still love each other to death, for the above reason...

Open Communication (preferrably when both parties are sober and not tired/grumpy) can solve many a problem... and nip in the butt other problems that have yet to fester... Also, listening is huge. Culturally we are not good listeners (actually bad listeners really)... never trained to listen... amazing what an open ear can do for another person...
 
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