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Fun with scUM

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Buckeyehead

Buckeyehead

Banned
Got this in an email the other day: :tongue2:

A graduate from Ohio State, a graduate from Michigan and a pig were in the hospital waiting room, each awaiting the birth of his first child.
Suddenly, the lights went out. Fortunately, power was restored shortly thereafter and the head nurse made her way to the waiting room. "I've got good news and bad news, gentlemen and pig," she announced. "Despite the electrical outage, two healthy boys and one healthy piglet havebeen delivered. However, since the lights went out at the most inopportunetime, we aren't sure which firstborn belongs to whom. The only way we know to resolve the problem is to draw straws and have the winner choose first."

The three proud papas agreed, and the Ohio grad won the drawing. He was escorted into the delivery room and looked at the three newborns for a painstakingly long time. Finally, with head bowed, he scooped up the piglet and headed for the door.

"Sir, are you quite certain that you've made the right choice?" the nurse asked. "No, I'm not," replied the Buckeye grad. "But I just couldn't run the risk of ending up with the Michigan kid."
 
A soldier from Michigan was on patrol in the desert of Iraq when he found a lamp on the ground. He picked it up, rubbed, and out came a genie. The genie said to the soldier, "I will grant you one wish." The soldier replied, "I wish for you to show me on this map where all of Saddam's illegal weapons are hidden." The genie responded, "I'm not that powerful of a genie. I cannot grant you that wish." "Well," the soldier responds, "then can you at least have the University of Michigan win the national championship this year?" After a moment, the genie says, "Let me see that map again."
 
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HAHAHA :tongue2: scUM jokes never get old :biggrin:

figured i would add one as well:


Ann Arbor News Report: Football practice in Ann Arbor was delayed on Monday for nearly two hours. One of the offensive players, while on his way to the locker room, happened to look down and notice a suspicious looking, unknown, white powdery substance on the practice field. The head coach, Lloyd Carr, immediately suspended practice while the FBI was called in to investigate. After a complete field analysis, the FBI determined that the white substance unknown to the players was the goal line. Practice was resumed when the FBI decided that the team would not be likely to encounter the substance again.
 
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OSU sKoolboy said:
HAHAHA :tongue2: scUM jokes never get old :biggrin:

figured i would add one as well:


Ann Arbor News Report: Football practice in Ann Arbor was delayed on Monday for nearly two hours. One of the offensive players, while on his way to the locker room, happened to look down and notice a suspicious looking, unknown, white powdery substance on the practice field. The head coach, Lloyd Carr, immediately suspended practice while the FBI was called in to investigate. After a complete field analysis, the FBI determined that the white substance unknown to the players was the goal line. Practice was resumed when the FBI decided that the team would not be likely to encounter the substance again.
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Gotta love it. Great one.
 
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