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growing older

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BoxCar_Willie

BoxCar_Willie

The World's Favorite Hobo
Anyone have any insight or good advice regarding the whole concept of growing older?

I'm pushing 28 this year, pretty young in the whole scheme of things. I feel like every couple years/months I sit down, reflect, and understand another layer of my surroundings, human nature, and just basically life. Then often I conclude that I know so very little about everything.

What other things do I have to look forward to besides that extra hair I have growing in my ears?
 
Just me talkin', but I wouldn't discredit yourself so much. I mean, clearly the only way to grow truly wiser is to put years under your belt and actually experience life. Nevertheless, having wealth of age does not make a man instantly more qualified than you in every respect. When I was even younger than I am now, I found the chiding of some of my elders rather misguided, delivered as if it was simply meant to keep me 'in my place'. I try to keep an open mind and allow that I can potentially learn from anyone - regardless of age. That said, I'm sure there are plenty of sage senior statesmen here who can provide worthwhile advice. So, advise away. I'm listening.
 
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vrbryant said:
Just me talkin', but I wouldn't discredit yourself so much. I mean, clearly the only way to grow truly wiser is to put years under your belt and actually experience life. Nevertheless, having wealth of age does not make a man instantly more qualified than you in every respect. When I was even younger than I am now, I found the chiding of some of my elders rather misguided, delivered as if it was simply meant to keep me 'in my place'. I try to keep an open mind and allow that I can potentially learn from anyone - regardless of age. That said, I'm sure there are plenty of sage senior statesmen here who can provide worthwhile advice. So, advise away. I'm listening.
Click to expand...


:) :) :)
I used to say things like this until....... well I wouldn't have listened to the advice I would have gave myself anyways....
 
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I get that a lot too, and its not that i dont repect my elders, but i see no reason to give more respect to a 40 yr old guy living in a trailer spittin out kids and beating his wife than a 25 yr old with a masters degree.. basically it has less to do with the number and more to do with where you are and where you are going.. (with major points deductions if it was handed to you by daddy)
 
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Interesting you are doing some reflecting on life at 28. I don't think I did any of that till after my second divorce at age 40.
I will be 67 in November.

Advice, (in no particular order) lets see.

1. If your eating habits are not good now, you must change them now.
I'm not just talking about junk food, I'm talking about having a proper diet.
Your body will begin letting you down around age 40 but you will barely
notice.
Around age 50 you will notice and you will try to change but can't seem to.
You will say,"hell, I don't eat anything like I used to do and I'm still gaining weight".
Getting weight off, and keeping it off, will become an almost impossible
task.
2. Take a hard look at your present drinking habits now. If getting shit
faced regularly is what you do now, It will bite you in the ass when you
are 50.
Both the above mentioned problems will kill you way be for your "time".
3. I won't say much about smoking (other than a little weed) it will kill you.
4. If you are not exercising regularly now, then start. I'm not talking about
busting your ass on a weekend, I'm talking about moderate exercise.
Don't beat you body to death. I used to run a lot. I have run 3 half
marathons and about 60 ten K's. I beat my knees to death. At one
point I would run 6 to 8 miles every night after work. Real stupid.
5. Don't be affraid of doing some therapy if you are having problems.
My unwillingness to to lose some of my macho male shit (including
sitting down with my wife and talking about what I was thinking) cost me
two marriges. Three+ years of therapy was one of the best things I
have ever done. I'm now married to a wonderful woman for the past
15 years. You don't ever want to go through a divorce where kids are
involved. I believe it can be prevented with some "work".
6. If you are not saving now, you must do so. Regular saving will help you
live a fairly good life when you are my age.
A major part of this "tip" is for you to learn how to invest your savings.
Start a 401K now. Don't think that Social Security and Medicare will be
there for you. AND, even if it were to be there, you will not be able to
live on it.
7. Give to some though to the day in the future when someone on Buckeye
Planet will say " who the hell was MIke Doss or even Craig Krenzel".
My 46 years of watching Ohio State football leads me to say that.
When I was 28, in 1965, had I thought back 46 years that would have
had me be thinking back to 1919. Hell, when I recently saw the 1937
ND/OSU game and could only barely remember a couple names from our
team. Forty years from now think of what a 28 year old will be saying
about these wonderful teams we have had the past few years.
Moral to the above, give us old farts a break at the Horseshoe and in life
cuz you gonna be one of dem one of these days.
I remember the old line that used to go around, " Hell, when I was 18 I
thought my old man was the dumbest SOB on the planet but when I
turned 21 I was astounded how much the old fart had learned in 3 years".
8. Starting at aboutage 50 something start to hurt in your body. Some little
thing. It will go away and something else will start up. And on and on and
on. Mine never seem to completely go away. Maybe if I had done some of
the things I've mentioned above when I was you age??? Well, I'll never
know.
9. Go Bucks, Forever.
 
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Well said CLT.

You have some years on me but I agree you only get one body and you have to take care of it. I started having knee surgeries in my 20's and it hurt my ability to be physically active today.

If I may two more.

Continue to read and learn. It is amazing how many people never pick up a book once they have graduated from high school or college. If you do read but are hooked on sci-fi try something outside your normal genre.

Keep a journal. It does not have to be every day and it does not have to contain world altering thoughts. But writing things down on a regular basis seems to help clear my thoughts and remind where I am headed.

Best of luck to you all.
 
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Bucknola, I thought of the journal idea as I was driving around today. Good one.

And one other.
Interview you mom and dad on video tape. Ask about their youth, etc, etc.
Do them seperately. And do it extensively.

I did this with my mom and dad on audio cassette tape a couple years before they died. They have been dead about 20 years and I still get those old tapes out on occation.
Both my kids have copies.
 
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CLT,

great words of wisdom... I shot you over some rep points :wink2:

I'll add this little nuget: Talk about your future plans/wishes with your loved one... in my line of work it never ceases to amaze me, how couples that have been together for thirty years wind up getting a divorse... the reason? they want to do different things during retirement, have wanted to do it for thirty years, and never bothered to talk to their spouse... once it comes time to retire, it becomes clear that neither will budge, so they divorse, still loving each other, so they each can fullfil their retirement dream... really sad if you ask me... guess it is better than a big lawsuit... makes you wonder if it all would have worked out, if they would have opened up the lines of communication all those past years...
 
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The only thing that I would add to CLT's List is that it's never to late to pursue your dream. I've had classes with people in their 60's and older were there was no possibility of a financial reward for getting their degree. They were just fullfilling a dream.
 
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I am knocking on 40's door and can say that many of CLT's points are right on the mark!!

I would add that if you have kids, get to know them. This means getting into their world. The little things that adults don't notice, like the different colrs in an ordinary rock from the driveway, are fascinating to kids. Let them show you and get wrapped up in their enthusiasm and fascination. It is a wonderful way to remain young at heart. I truly believe that age is a state of mind so remain young at heart.

My first lesson in the age is a state of mind business came from my grandmother. We were visiting her on her 92nd birthday and my mom made a comment to her about being pretty alert and healthy considering her age. Grandma snapped at my mother, "What are you talking about! I'm not old." At that time it hit me that grandma didn't think she was old and didn't act like it.

Someone mentioned earlier to continue to learn. I would add to that to challenge your brain (and muscles) by doing routine tasks with your "off" hand. If you are right-handed, brush your teeth with your left hand, toss a football with your left hand, etc. It's a great challenge for the brain.

Finally, if you are an OSU alum, make every opportunity to return home for every home game Saturday. Nothing rejuvenates the mind and body quite like the atmosphere on home game day around the OSU campus!
 
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Many great points here by CLT, Prof, and Gear. I would suggest to:

keep an open mind in anything that you do. You will learn that there are many many ways to do things, some that you may never have believed that you would agree too.

Keep the lines of communication open. This is especially true with your spouse and your children.

Don't be afraid to learn to listen. This one has been especially hard for me, I have to work at it continuously.

Be man enough to admit when your wrong and not gloat when you are right.

Enjoy life, it is to short to go through as a bitter person. I learned this from watching my father.

Once I hit 40, I thought that I deserved a certain amount of respect for my experience, education, etc. Anymore, I'm am not sure when you really reach that point if ever.
 
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Lots of good points all ready made, and i am almost 40 and have a few things to add. Find something you like to do for a living. Nothing worse than working a job you dont like. Try and help people, but dont be upset if they dont listen to you or want your help. It is there life, not yours. Buy your own place (that you can realistically afford) as early as you can. And last but not least, try and be happy and content with your life. Hopefully you will have a long life and it is going to be filled with all sorts of doubts, problems, challenges, etc.. Try to keep a positive outlook on life and enjoy the ride because you only get one go around. Most of the time, if you do what is right in your mind, you will feel it was worth it even though it might not seem to at the time.
 
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