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I love The Onion

Discussion in 'Open Discussion (Work-safe)' started by FCollinsBuckeye, Aug 25, 2004.

  1. FCollinsBuckeye

    FCollinsBuckeye Senior Former Game Champion

    Customer Service Operator Safely In Remote Location

    <TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=410 border=0><TBODY><TR><TD class=textreg>PHOENIX, AZ—Incompetent and uncaring U-Haul helpline operator Kamio Morton's remote Phoenix location is the only thing protecting him from brutal, bloody revenge at the hands of thousands of irate customers, sources reported Monday. "Listen, shitass, get me a tow truck right this fucking minute or, so help me God, I'll gut you," stranded Brooklyn motorist Don Jewison said from the shoulder of Chicago's I-294, where he had been awaiting assistance for more than four hours. "Put me on hold one more time, and I'll put you in the fucking hospital." Jewison is the 63rd motorist to impotently threaten Morton's life this year, a streak that is expected to come to a sudden end when a U-Haul truck inevitably breaks down within walking distance of Phoenix.</TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>

  2. hotrodr123

    hotrodr123 Newbie

    That was funny.

    Go Bucks
  3. FCollinsBuckeye

    FCollinsBuckeye Senior Former Game Champion

    I browse the Onion from time to time and for some reason, today's headline struck me as especially funny:


  4. BayBuck

    BayBuck Buckeyes are best

    "Area man loves Onion"

    FCollinsBuckeye likes this.
  5. iambrutus

    iambrutus Screw Blue

  6. Taosman

    Taosman Your Cousin In New Mexxico

    I canz haz Onion wif myzz cheeseburger?
    Last edited: Mar 15, 2008
  7. gregorylee

    gregorylee I'd rather be napping!!

    Now that, is an onion!

    ArtilleryBuck and BuckNutty like this.
  8. Jake

    Jake TBDBITL & YNWA ‘17 The Deuce Champ '18 The Deuce Champ Fantasy Baseball Champ

  9. Oh8ch

    Oh8ch Cognoscente of Omphaloskepsis Staff Member

    Deety likes this.
  10. BigWoof31

    BigWoof31 Senior

  11. jlb1705

    jlb1705 hipster doofus Bookie

    Some highlights:

  12. Dryden

    Dryden Sober as Sarkisian Staff Member Tech Admin

  13. MililaniBuckeye

    MililaniBuckeye The satanic soulless freight train that is Ohio St Staff Member Tech Admin

    Like a bullet to the head?
  14. ScriptOhio

    ScriptOhio Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

  15. BuckeyeLiger87

    BuckeyeLiger87 The more I see the less I know

    And the funniest video The Onion has ever done NSFW!!!

    Use Of 'N-Word' May End Porn Star's Career &bull; VideoSift: Online Video *Quality Control

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