This site is supported by the advertisements on it, please disable your AdBlocker so we can continue to provide you with the quality content you expect.
  1. Follow us on Twitter @buckeyeplanet and @bp_recruiting, like us on Facebook! Enjoy a post or article, recommend it to others! BP is only as strong as its community, and we only promote by word of mouth, so share away!
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Consider registering! Fewer and higher quality ads, no emails you don't want, access to all the forums, download game torrents, private messages, polls, Sportsbook, etc. Even if you just want to lurk, there are a lot of good reasons to register!
    Dismiss Notice

Ladies and gentlemen, I've been to Dell and back, and this is my story...

Discussion in 'Computers, Home Theater & Technology' started by Clarity, Dec 12, 2003.

  1. Clarity

    Clarity Will Bryant Staff Member

    My emails are in blue. Theirs are in red. Because red is for hell, and hell is where Dell is headquartered. Timestamps (exactly as noted on the emails) will be in green before each message.

    This is not a work of fiction, this is an actual ONGOING exchange I'm having with them. Not all subject matter herein may be appropriate for people of all ages, parental guidance is suggested...

    Where appropriate or necessary, I, as your guide and narrator, will make comments and add to the story. These contributions will be italicized. I offer all this order, because without it, you would have to read it all the way I did. And gentle friends, I wouldn't wish that on anyone. My brain is goo at this point, and it's best if I don't spread the infection to others. This sanitized copy should be safe for public consumption, but you read on at your own risk regardless.

    (ed. - I decided recently to send an email to Dell through their support site. In order to get one to them, you have to provide a customer code, and more importantly, a unique identifier tag for your computer. I only have one Dell computer, a laptop -- but what this does for them is provide them (with my email) a breakdown of exactly what this system has on it. Remember that. What I wanted from Dell was simple, I -- you know, I'll let you see for yourself. But merely asking a question, any question, was my first mistake...)

    5:08 PM, 12/9/03<br>I have a Dell Inspiron 8500 laptop with a geForce4 4200 Go graphics card. My desktop resolution via the laptop's UXGA display is 1920x1200 with true color. I also own a 16:9 Sony 34xbr910 television set which supports all the current high resolution and high definition modes.

    I was wondering if there's a known means of using my HDTV as a monitor in widescreen mode at higher resolutions? I just used an S-video cable to connect the two, and what I got was a 4:3 screen centered on the TV at the max resolution available in that mode, which was 1024x768. Text was hard to read, images fuzzy, and my desktop was disproportioned because of the conversion from widescreen on the laptop (1920x1200), to 4:3 on the tv (1024x768).

    The laptop has S-video out, and the normal 15 pin monitor out. The television has S-video, composite, component and DVI inputs.

    Any assistance or information you could provide would be greatly appreciated. If there's a wireless solution, that would be ideal, but not a requisite.


    6:09 PM, 12/9/03<br>Dear Dell Customer,

    Dell's e-mail software interprets your message as a request for help with problems connecting a Dell notebook computer DVD-ROM to a TV.

    The Table of Contents at top of the document lists all of the issues covered here.

    If your problem is not listed, or you need further assistance, please just click [Reply] to this document, and a Dell e-mail agent will read and answer your message.


    (ed. - what followed was a cookie cutter response about connecting via an S-Video cable. On topic, but not the information I needed. So I clicked [Reply] as directed, and reached out to a human. Because humans I thought, were better than machines... That was my second mistake.)

    6:37 PM, 12/9/03<br>I would like to connect this laptop to a Sony 34xbr910 16:9 set which supports 1080i resolution. I'm hoping to make full use of both the HD resolution on the set, and the widescreen format.

    The laptop is natively widescreen as well, with a UXGA display at 1920x1200.

    Basically I'm wondering how to connect the laptop to the tv by way of a DVI input on the set, or perhaps component video cables in order to achieve a nice crisp display like I enjoy on my laptop's screen.

    Hooking through an s-video cable offers a very fuzzy 4:3 display at 1024x768 on the screen. Poor I assume because it does it in NTSC format which is more like 512x512 or something.

    Any ideas or assistance would be greatly appreciated. An ideal
    solution is wireless, but that isn't an absolute requisite.


    9:08 PM, 12/9/03<br>Dear Dell Valued Customer,

    Thank you for contacting Dell eSupport and Services (ESS). We appreciate the opportunity to assist you. I apologize for your trouble and I assure you it is our hope that you have a positive experience with our company.

    if I understand the issue correctly then you need information about using the Dual Monitor with your system.

    In order to resolve the issue I would recommend you to please visit the below mentioned link which says "Dual Monitor Support for the Nvidia GeForce 4 Ti 4600 Video Card"


    (ed. - Let's just stop here for one moment in mid email... For those not keeping track, or like me aren't a tech mind, let me point out here that the Nvidia GeForce 4 Ti 4600 Video Card is for a desktop PC only. It couldn't fit in my laptop if I tore out the keyboard, hollowed out the inside, and tried closing the screen by sitting on it. I have the Nvidia GeForce 4 4200 Go Video Card. Which *does* sound and look familiar, but it's the one that fits in a laptop. It's also the one they have staring at them on their screen (I've verified this), listed as the video card in my system when my account profile gets pulled up with the email.)

    support.dell.com/us/en/kb/document.asp?dn=1065326

    Some email programs will wrap this address to a second line so you will have to copy each of the lines directly into the address bar of your browser with no spaces between the two sections.

    This should resolve the issue in hand. If the problem still persists please feel free to contact us.

    I again apologize for your trouble.

    Thank you for choosing Dell.

    Respectfully,
    ** Ralph **


    (ed. - Now, before we move on here, I need to admit something. I'm already a little ticked off at the end of the last response. I mean, (1) Ralph clearly didn't bother to at least glance at my system settings, nor did he read my emails, otherwise he (a person in TECH SUPPORT AT A COMPUTER COMPANY) would have realized that I don't have the graphics card he just mentioned. (2) Ralph clearly didn't understand my question, because he thinks the issue is about dual monitor support. It's not, that's something entirely different. (3) His name is Ralph. And with profuse apologies to any Ralph's that may be reading this -- that name coupled with his answers, coupled with my frustration over what I *thought* was going to be a quick and easy question and answer process led me to be a little, well, 'snippy' in the next message. But there's something else you have to understand. While I was reading Ralph's response (which by the way was further off base than the computer's before), a Dell commercial had come on television, touting their "AWARD WINNING CUSTOMER SERVICE." The moons aligned, my mood was set, and Ralph was the only outlet for my frustration, and the only hope of an answer from Dell. Let's continue.

    9:27 PM, 12/9/03<br>Hi Ralph, and before I begin, I'd like to apologize in advance.

    My question, as clearly detailed in multiple previous emails, has absolutely nothing to do with Dual Monitor Support. Additionally, I don't even have an nVidia geForce 4 Ti 4600 Video card. This is a laptop, I believe that's a desktop card. I assume from your email address (MOBILE-pc@dell.com) that you address MOBILE issues.

    I'm going to rephrase my original question below, in the hope that THIS TIME a human with basic English language comprehension skills reads it, and offers at least a simple on-topic reply.

    I also need to say that Dell's customer and technical support used to be a wonderful thing. The level of assistance and attention drew loads of customers (myself included) over from competitors like Gateway and Micron/Zeos. Since buying this laptop (not coincidentally about the time that Dell enacted *major* service-cutting policies, including moving telephone support overseas), contacting your company has been nothing but an absolute headache each and every single time.


    (ed. - There's another reason I'm pissed off with Ralph and Dell. More later...)

    Even the most simple requests and questions result in, well, problems like this one. I ask about apples, and someone comes back with oranges. Leads me to believe that some sort of poorly executed program somewhere is trying to auto-answer inquiries at the first, second and even third levels, and only when the customer is completely frustrated and fed up does a human actually get involved. I will ABSOLUTELY NOT...

    (ed. - Big honkin deal, I hate that I said this -- so what if I don't buy. Does Ralph care? Is Ralph even reading this? CAN RALPH EVEN READ?!?)

    ...be buying from Dell in the future unless this changes, and I can assure you that I'm not alone in my anger and disappointment. Honestly, I'm surprised given all the Dell commercials that continue to run, improperly touting Dell's high level of customer support, that someone hasn't channeled their frustration into a class action lawsuit. Perhaps they have.

    BUT, to get back to the original question, PLEASE try and comprehend...

    I would like to connect my laptop (a Dell Inspiron 8500 with the nVidia geForce4 4200 Go graphics card - not the Ti, please, no more Ti) to my HD television, a Sony 34xbr910 which offers DVI, component, composite and S-Video inputs.

    I've done it with an s-video cable, but that only results in a very fuzzy 4:3 picture at 1024x768. NOT utilizing the sets capacity for 1080i resolution at 16:9. I'm hoping there's a known solution (from Dell or not), that will let me connect to my television through component or DVI inputs, allowing for a nice, crisp, clean, high resolution image on the set. Effectively turning into a very large monitor. I want to make use of its HD support and the wide screen format.

    I don't know how to make that more clear, and now I've asked it three different ways. Obviously, this fumbled process has really annoyed me.


    (ed. - A long period of inactivity follows. I can only assume that during this period, Ralph was frantically reading his tea leaves, checking the tarot cards, or swinging a dead cat over his head counter-clockwise in some bizarre voodoo ritual which would allow him to come up with the answer I desired. That, or it was his time away from what I'll hesitantly call "work", and he responded the next day after throwing a dart up to see what random answer he would give.)

    2:42 PM, 12/10/03<br>Dear Dell Valued Customer,

    Thank you for your time and cooperation

    I apologize for the persistent trouble that you are facing.

    if I understand the issue correctly then your system is facing the problem while using with the External Monitor.

    In order to resolve the issue I would recommend you to please visit the below mentioned link which helps you to download the latest Video Drivers for your system.

    support.dell.com/filelib/format.aspx?releaseid=r65893

    Some email programs will wrap this address to a second line so you will have to copy each of the lines directly into the address bar of your browser with no spaces between the two sections.

    This should resolve the issue in hand. If the problem still persists please feel free to contact us.

    I again apologize for your trouble.

    Thank you again for choosing Dell.

    Respectfully,
    ** Ralph **


    5:47 PM, 12/10/03<br>HI RALPH!

    My problem still has not been addressed. Worse, it's being ignored.

    Everything you need to know is in the history within this message. I'll just keep trying until it's addressed.

    Dell has the worst customer service I've ever been exposed to. But I like you Ralph, you're keen.

    (ed. - Yes, good observation, that *was* exactly where I lost what was left of my mind.)

    <font size=1>"Gotta get off, gonna get ... Have to get off from this ride..."</font>


    7:14 PM, 12/10/03<br>Dear Dell Valued Customer,

    Thank you for your time and cooperation for carrying out the requested troubleshooting.

    I apologize for the persistent trouble that you are facing. Since there can be more than one reasons that may lead to the issues that you are facing, the following troubleshooting is based on another probable reason.

    if I understand the issue correctly then your system is facing the problem while using the External Monitor.

    In order to resolve the issue I would recommend you to please visit the below mentioned link to download the latest BIOS driver for your system and then try connecting the External Monitor.

    support.dell.com/filelib/format.aspx?releaseid=r65905

    Some email programs will wrap this address to a second line so you will have to copy each of the lines directly into the address bar of your browser with no spaces between the two sections.

    We appreciate your patience and understanding. We value you as our customer and your satisfaction is very important to us.

    Please accept my apologies for the difficulties you encountered with your technical issues. I assure you that your situation is not indicative of the quality service Dell is capable of providing. I sincerely appreciate your taking the time to share your experience with us. Your comments are very important to us and will assist in making improvements

    Thank you again for choosing Dell.

    Respectfully,
    ** Ralph **


    9:39 PM, 12/10/03<br>No, I'm sorry. We still have not addressed my question. Repeating the last response but changing 'BIOS' for 'Video Drivers' isn't getting us any closer.

    I'll repeat the issue, because I like that. I like that and I like you Ralph. Here it is, in full;

    What cables and/or hardware do I need to connect my laptop to an HDTV, so that the resulting display on the tv is 16:9 at the highest resolution a television capable of 1080i can produce?

    When I connect with an S-Video cable, I get a 4:3 picture at what Windows claims is 1024x768. But as it's NTSC format, I suspect it's actually merely 512x512.

    I'm looking for a nice clean picture, something like 1920x1080i, a picture like I get at 1920x1200 on my laptop with the UXGA display. I want to use my television as a monitor.

    S-Video is not the solution. So what is? My laptop has VGA (15-pin) and S-Video outs. My television has DVI, component, S-Video, and composite ins. What will go between the laptop and the display?

    This isn't a BIOS issue, nor is it a video driver issue, those two bits of code can not become some sort of magical physical link between the two pieces of hardware. Or at least it's not *only* a BIOS or video driver issue. It's a connectivity issue. Do I need special cables? Do I need a special adapter? WHAT do I need to connect the two, to achieve the display resolution and clarity that I seek?

    I have NO problem with this being passed on to someone else. But I can't begin to tell you how fed up I am with this process. I just want an answer, I bought the laptop from you all, I want to do something specific, it seems reasonable that you (Dell) would be the appropriate party to ask.

    I won't lie, I will *never* buy from Dell again for personal or business reasons. So another option at this point is just to blow me off, perhaps that would end my headache (and yours) as well.

    I apologize for my hostility. Appreciate that it's not meant towards you personally, but rather this fiasco, and Dell as a company. My stomach turns every time I see a Dell commercial talking about award winning customer service. I think about this situation. Then I think about the ongoing disaster where Dell replaced a part on one of our machines, owes us a credit of over $50, and 4-5 months later, not only have we not received the credit (4-5 months is roughly 120-150 days), but when we call the overseas customer service idiots, we can't even communicate with them effectively enough to find out when or if it's happening. At least, once we manage to get them to acknowledge that, yes, there is something in the system indicating you (Dell) owe us money -- then they can't quite figure out why it hasn't gone out yet, who to talk to, or what we should do about it except "CALL BACK LATER."


    (ed. - Remember earlier when I said there was another reason? That $54.90 they owe us is it. We're never getting it. Ever. But at least my tech support question will be the death of me, and I'll never have to worry about dealing with Customer Service over the money again. Which is good, because THEY MAKE RALPH LOOK LIKE A SUPER GENIUS FROM A PLANET MUCH MORE ADVANCED, AND A SPECIES MUCH MORE EVOLVED THAN OURS.)

    <font size=1>"They're coming to take me away ah-ha, they're coming to take me away ee-hee, oo-hoo, ah-haa..."</font>


    Now, in order for you to appreciate the significance of that, you should know I was a linguist for the Marine Corps and a specific government agency. My job was communicating with people others couldn't communicate with. And yet, because of the unfortunate combination of poor English, poor training, and poor quality employees in that department -- communication is nearly impossible, even for me.

    But I digress, that missing credit is NOT the issue here.

    I explained it all above again. I hope that's clear enough to result in at least an on-topic answer. Again, please feel free to forward this to as many people within Dell as possible, I say that in the hopes of someone understanding, appreciating, and simply offering a direct response.

    Losing my mind,

    [wcb]


    (ed. - At this point, Ralph leaves me. Presumably to intellectually maul another victim. After all we had been through together, it was over just like that. Not even so much as a kiss goodnight. Ralph hasn't been heard from since... With Ralph goes the always soothing "Dear Valued Dell Customer" opening. I have moved up to...)

    8:31 PM, 12/11/03<br>Dear Will,

    Thank you for your time and cooperation in carrying out the requested troubleshooting.

    I apologize for the persistent trouble that you are facing. Since there can be more than one reasons that may lead to the issues that you are facing, the following troubleshooting is based on another probable reason.

    Since the previous email agent is not available today, I am replying to your message so that we can solve your problem as quickly as possible.

    Will, please note that the 64MB DDR NVIDIA GeForce4 Ti 4200 Video Card...


    (ed. - "GeForce4 Ti" -- I have no response to this. But for the love of Christ, if this purple bunny doesn't stop dancing around the room, laughing maniacally and trying to convince me to kill people, I'm really going to lose it.)

    ...that you have has a DVI-I Connector, the DVI-I Connector is only for use with a DVI panel. Attach your DVI panel cable to the DVI-I output connector located on the 64MB DDR NVIDIA GeForce4 Ti 4200 with TV Out card. If you need additional installation information, please refer to the user's guide provided with your TV.

    Please visit the links below to know more about this:

    docs.us.dell.com/docs/video/hmga5/en/connect.htm
    and
    docs.us.dell.com/docs/video/hmga5/en/index.htm

    Some email programs will wrap this address to a second line so you will have to copy each of the lines directly into the address bar of your browser with no spaces between the two sections.

    Also please change the TVOUT settings with the help of the instructions in the link below:

    docs.us.dell.com/docs/video/hmga5/en/usage.htm

    Some email programs will wrap this address to a second line so you will have to copy each of the lines directly into the address bar of your browser with no spaces between the two sections.

    Thank you for choosing Dell.

    Respectfully,
    ** Patrick **


    (ed. - But I don't understand, Mr. Bunny... How does their blood make you stronger?)

    9:39 PM, 12/11/03<br>Hi Patrick. I don't have the Ti, that's a desktop card. This is a laptop, I have the nVidia geForce4 4200 Go card. There is no DVI output. Just one 15-pin VGA out, and one S-Video out. I just need to know what cable, or conversion device (either way, a physical piece of hardware) I need to obtain the holy grail.

    1:55 PM, 12/11/03<br>Dear Will,

    Since the previous email agent is not available today, I am replying to your message so that we can solve your problem as quickly as possible.

    Will, I would recommend you to follow the below troubleshooting steps to solve the issue.

    1. Click on Start > Settings > Control Panel.
    2. Under control panel go to Display.
    3. Under display > Setting > Advance tab > Geforce4 4200 go

    4. In the left side click on the view display mode.Then on device settings 5. On this page u can make the changes for your tv.

    Following the above steps should solve the issue.

    We assure you of our best services at all times.

    Thank you again for choosing Dell.

    Respectfully,

    ** Gabrielle **


    (ed. - blblblblblllblblblblblbllbllblblllbbuhbuhbuhbuhbuhbblblblblbllblblblblblblurp.)

    <font size=1>"Gotta get off, gonna get ... Off of this Merry-Go-Round..."</font>


    2:50 AM, 12/12/03<br>Dear Satan,

    This has now reached comical proportions. I'd drop it and move on in disgust, but now I think I'll make an article about it for others to enjoy. Can always use a good story.

    Let me try this again. I don't simply want to hook my laptop up to my tv. I've done that by connecting an S-Video cable between the two. I want to hook my laptop (using my geForce4 4200 Go card) up to my Sony 34xbr910 in such a way that I can make use of that sets capacity for 16:9 1080i HD resolution. Meaning I have to connect into the television via a DVI input, or a component. It offers both. The laptop offers a VGA out, as well as an S-Video. How do I accomplish my mission?

    Before you cut and paste an answer here, take just one frigging moment and scroll through the epic length journey through the depths of complete and total incompetence and idiocy that this ongoing exchange represents. Scroll down and see the number of times I've asked the same question, and the number of times some half-witted troglodyte has managed to completely circumvent that question, and regurgitate up some meaningless and completely unrelated snippet of waste for me. How can ANYONE who works for your pathetic excuse of a company browse through this and feel anything but complete and utter shame, an overwhelming sense of failure and despair? I am completely convinced that Michael Dell could turn his customer service and technical support ranks over to the nearest zoo, and the monkey cage, despite their propensity for flinging feces, could do a vastly superior job. I weep for the future of this country, that people like the ones I've been exposed to are even ALLOWED to hold jobs in which they have to interact with customers. I am dumber for having spoken to each person during this process, and were it not for the unintentional comedic value of this exchange, I'm certain I would have resorted to taking gasoline and a match to my laptop by now -- just because it bears the vile name "DELL".

    Think I'm being rude or out of line? I'm sorry, I really am. But again, I strongly invite you to just peruse the history within this very email. No links, no attachments, nothing but the exchanges I've been forced to suffer through.

    It's a simple question I think. I'm certain I could ask my 70 year old grandparents the question, and despite their not even owning a real computer, I suspect as they are of at least average intelligence, they could come up with an answer that was somehow at least related to the question. I mean, even if they just said "I don't know, son -- a cable maybe?", then that would be closer to the mark than what I've received from "TECHNICAL SUPPORT", and "CUSTOMER SERVICE".

    I intend to crusade to make sure that no one I know even considers buying a Dell computer, lest they suffer through the same levels of insanity I have had to over the last few days, just because I want to know how to make X connect to Y, in such a way that the resulting display is of Z quality.

    But, I think we all know three things here;

    (A) I'm going to get a response to this from yet another different person. This response will show signs that my message was not read, or at least not understood. Something like, "Dear Will, I would recommend you do the following steps; (1) reinstall DOS 3.0 on your escalator (2) Make sure your spaghetti is connected to your testicles."

    (B) No one at Dell really gives a rat's ass that their customer service is this bad, because they're saving $X by outsourcing their support needs to third world countries. And they STILL get to run commercials citing first rate customer service awards from 3 years ago.

    (C) Eventually I'll give up and go away, and for you and your simian peers there in the pen, that's the same result you get if you actually take some small amount of pride in yourselves and your work, and do something crazy like take 2 minutes out of your wasted lives to try and find a reasonable answer to what was originally a reasonably stated question.

    It's around the holidays that people spout things like "Peace, and good will towards men." But those idiots clearly are not having to ask Dell Computers a question. If they were, they would have a different appreciation and capacity for holiday spirit, and where tinsel and sugar plums should be shoved viscously, and ideally while on fire.

    You, Gabrielle, have been the person closest to the answer I seek, except for the original computer. Can I speak to it again please? If no, then please take a moment and see if we might be able to just take the final step to nirvana. I'm looking for a thing. It's probably smaller than a breadbox, bigger than a howler monkey's fist, but it *is* a physical object, or a group of physical objects. It (or they) will allow me to do what I want, and then we never have to speak again.

    Doesn't that sound nice? It does to me. Help me Gabrielle, you're my only hope.

    Love,

    ** Will **


    8:52 AM, 12/12/03<br>Dear Dell Valued Customer,

    Thank you for your time and cooperation for carrying out the requested troubleshooting.I apologize for the persistent trouble that you are facing.

    Since the previous email agent is not available today, I am replying to your message so that we can solve your problem as quickly as possible.

    Dell Valued Customer, please accept my apologies for the displeasure that this matter may have caused.

    I have all my concerns for the issues you are experiencing with the system and wish to resolve them soon. I might have felt the same had I been in your place.


    (ed. - "I have all my concerns for the issues you are experiencing", if you peel aside the form response text and really look at the stuff they had to write themselves, you start to appreciate that you're looking at English as a Second Language. Which is not a shot at the capacity of people overseas in the slightest. It's just an effort to try and appreciate why there's no real communication here. I'm emailing Nepal or something, and they are (understandably) limited to matching words in my email to available tech support and information links. I suspect that's actually done for them on the fly, they pick one or more and respond with existing scripts. I might as well be talking to the computer. I wish I had been all this time.)

    please visit the link given below which describes, "Connectors"

    docs.us.dell.com/docs/video/hmga5/en/connect.htm


    (ed. - I like this one. It tells me what a VGA Connector looks like and does. That's what I have as an output on my laptop, but not my television. It also describes and details a DVI connector. That's what I have on my television, but not the laptop. It doesn't tell how to bridge the two, that's what I needed. I'd assume they were mocking me here, but that would require some capacity for individual and original thought.)

    ALSO

    docs.us.dell.com/docs/video/hmga5/en/usage.htm

    The above link explains, "Using the Video Card to attach a TV"

    ALSO


    please visit the link given below which describes, "User Guide"

    docs.us.dell.com/docs/video/hmga5/en/index.htm


    (ed. - These two links are included to just DROWN me in information. You can tell they're panicking, because now instead of one link to the wrong information, I get THREE! The thinking here being (I assume) that the more links they send, the better the chance that something in one of them will appease me.)

    Please note that some email programs will wrap this address to a second line so you will have to copy each of the lines directly into the address bar of your browser with no spaces between the two sections.

    Please make use of the above links to know about the resolutions
    supported and how to connect which connector for Digital output.


    (ed. - What's that? "how to connect which connector for Digital output!?!?!" That's the closest we've ever been! I just soiled myself. Sadly, despite this promising little comment, none of the links address my specific concerns.)

    Have a Great Day!

    Thank you again for choosing Dell.

    Respectfully,
    Melvin


    (ed. - It isn't lost on me that he signed that "Melvin" and not "** Melvin **". Obviously I've reached the highest level of management there at Dell now. When they get past frivolous markings around their name, you know they're serious.)

    3:05 PM, 12/12/03<br>Dear Valued Dell Representative,

    Unfortunately, none of those links address my needs.

    It has become apparent that your department has no capacity beyond providing links to existing information on your website. Information I scoured long ago in an effort to find the answers to my question. It's not there.

    So, I surrender.

    At the direction of a deranged rabbit, I emailed Alienware, another PC company. I asked them the exact same question I started out with here. This morning I had an email waiting for me that told me exactly what piece of hardware would do it. They didn't have the luxury you do of knowing exactly what my hardware specifications were.

    Key Digital Systems (KDS) makes a VGA to Component Video Adapter/Transcoder with VGA Loop Through. The model number is KD-VTCA3, and the URL is here;

    keydigital.com/KeyDigital/Itemdesc.asp?CartId={30510C8D-0A89-446D-8ED2-9F544E8AE1D6}&ic=KDVTCA3&Tp=

    This little device, when coupled with a piece of software called PowerStrip, www.entechtaiwan.net/ps.html can and does provide a successful link between a PC and an HDTV, resulting in a picture at 1080i HD resolution with the proper settings within.

    The good folks at Alienware went on to tell me that it's not something they've directly dealt with before, but that I should probably talk to someone at Sony about the appropriate refresh rates and resolutions before taking this on, lest I try to feed my tv something it's not going to like. That was really helpful of them.

    "Helpful tech support" -- it's a strange and wonderful concept. Being exposed to it has made me realize there's an exciting world of real people out there who can do more than spit out the same garbage over and over again.

    Dell is a disaster. But at least you tried. I think. Maybe. No, not so much. But at least I respect that your latest "effort" involved sending me multiple useless links, instead of just one. No, no I don't. But I *do* appreciate that they were all each in the appropriate arena. No, not that either.

    Next time I have a tech question for Dell, I'll be sure to write it on a piece of paper, wipe my ass with that, and then flush it down the toilet. I suspect that will be a much more satisfying and informative experience -- and far less frustrating.

    If you see Michael Dell, please kick him in the balls for me.


    (ed. - That's it. End of story. I'm sure the response to this last email will offer more links, but I won't bother posting it here. My journey is over and I've moved on.)

    Oh, final little bit of information here that I think you will enjoy. Those links he sent in the final email?

    They're for the geForce4 Ti card. Just let that sink in for a second.
     
  2. 3yardsandacloud

    3yardsandacloud Administrator Emeritus

    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

    Sorry to laugh Clarity, but that's some funny sh!t! Why don't you ask to get a response from that kid on the DELL commercials. You know the one, he's always talking to the parents of one of his friends. Convincing them to buy his pal a DELL computer. I bet he could find a solution for you in about 2 minutes.

    I think we should all make some bets. Here is my bet:

    DELL's next solution/reply will be:

    Dear Will,

    Since the previous email agent is not available today, I am replying to your message so that we can solve your problem as quickly (relatively speaking ... as compared to the creation of the universe) as possible.

    Will, I would recommend you to follow the below troubleshooting steps to solve the issue.

    Go out and buy yourself one of those new fangled Multimedia Projectors (heck, we probably even sell one, but it probably won't connect to your Nvidia GeForce 4 Ti 4600 Video Card). I think most of them can connect with that S-Video connection you claim to have.

    From there plug in and turn ON the Multimedia Projector.

    Next, aim the projector at your HD television (a Sony 34xbr910 which offers DVI, component, composite and S-Video inputs).

    To continue, change the focus on your new Multimedia Projector (these steps should be covered in the Projector's User Manuals ... sorry no link). Adjust focus so that the image being projected accurately fits the size of your Sony 34xbr910 video screen. Note: you may be required to MOVE the Multimedia Projector closer to (or further away from) your Sony 34xbr910 video screen to get the sizing "just right".

    That should conclude all the steps needed to display images from your Dell Inspiron 8500 laptop onto your HD television (a Sony 34xbr910 which offers DVI, component, composite and S-Video inputs).

    The afore mentioned solution offers you an additional benefit. You will NOT even need to plug in and turn on your HD television (a Sony 34xbr910 which offers DVI, component, composite and S-Video inputs). This should provide you a tremendous savings on your next electric bill.

    If you have further issues that need to be resolved I would recommend you to please visit the below mentioned link which says "Dual Monitor Support for the Nvidia GeForce 4 Ti 4600 Video Card"
    support.dell.com/us/en/kb/document.asp?dn=1065326

    Please rest assured that this NEW troubleshooting solution will be added to our database. We can assume that many other DELL customers share your very same problem and the solutions we've uncovered should be made available to them as well.

    This should resolve the issue in hand. If the problem still persists please feel free to contact us.

    I again apologize for your trouble.

    Thank you for choosing Dell.

    Respectfully,
    Monkey #1
     
  3. gbearbuck

    gbearbuck Herbie for President

    Clarity,

    This might explain why our tech guys were so happy when our firm stopped using Dell, and went to a fully IBM platform... note, I work for an 11.9 billion dollar market cap company (using the close price as of yeasterday) with tens of thousands of employee's (maybe into the 100's of thousands... don't frankly know how may folks this firm and it's subsidaries employ??) who each have a computer (or two is some cases... actually in my office, most cases)... simple math says Dell lost business for 100,000 computers, if not more...

    Figured you would like to know that... on a seperate note, my computer at home is a Dell and I have yet to have a problem with it, hope I don't need to use Dell's "tech support."

    I would also think this would hurt them in selling their support packages... thoses sales are almost all gravy.

    I read in a computer mag. that the state of Indiana as well as another large computer company (might be Dell for all I know) have pulled contracts with India, due to a large amount of complaints from the outsourced tech desk... The trend however still seems to be, to soutsource these types of services to lower cost countries... have to keep the bottom line up for shareholders...
     
  4. Clarity

    Clarity Will Bryant Staff Member

    I just wrapped up the story with the last two emails.

    Worthy of note is that after touching base with another company, sending them the exact same email I sent to Dell in the beginning, that within 12 hours I had a response that simply and directly answered my question.

    Obviously I was an ass in a lot of my responses, but that whole exchange was just insane. And you still have to appreciate that we have deal with the same, BUT FAR WORSE, when we call various departments overseas to ask about that missing credit. Most often we're told that it's "in processing." But then when we call back a week later, they don't know what credit we're talking about. At all. Until we explain the history to them, they check our account notes, see what we're talking about, and then it's "in processing" again.

    But that's another thread for another day.
     
  5. RAMdrvr1

    RAMdrvr1 All Galaxy '14 NCAA Pick'em Champ

    I know that this wasn't suppose to be funny (or I don't
    think it was), but I laughed so hard my gut still hurts.
    It reminds me of a conversation I had with DirectTV.
    After I got over being angry, I got a good laugh out of
    it. No answers, but a ood laugh.

    "What we have here is a failure to communicate." :)
     
  6. MililaniBuckeye

    MililaniBuckeye The satanic soulless freight train that is Ohio St Staff Member Tech Admin

    C-Dog, when you said, "Dear Will, I would recommend you do the following steps; (1) reinstall DOS 3.0 on your escalator (2) Make sure your spaghetti is connected to your testicles.", I about died laughing. I've always been happy with my Dell computers, but the last time I talked to their Tech Support was several years back, I guess before they tranferred Tech Support to Assbangastan, so I was actually helped out OK. Now we now why that kid who was their pitch man for years was busted for pot...he needed it just to get through the bullshit lies in the commericial script.
     
  7. BrutusBobcat

    BrutusBobcat Icon and Entertainer

    Alienware is the shizz daddy izzle. :atom: Too bad I'd have to sell one of my cars to get one. Make that two of my cars. :sob:

    Dell tech support -> :box: <- Clarity
     
  8. Clarity

    Clarity Will Bryant Staff Member

    I love my Dell systems. This laptop (the one I was emailing them about), an Inspiron 8500 is the perfect desktop replacement and I haven't had a single problem. If you never need to communicate with anyone but salespeople (who are terrific), then Dell is as far as I'm concerned one of the best mass producers out there.

    I have learned they've decided to pull business (only) customer service and tech support back to the States because of the total disaster that was the India outsourcing. So individual customers still get the Indian connection, but at least corporate users don't.

    I still don't have my $50 credit from them, and it's clear to me now I never will.
     
  9. BuckeyeNation27

    BuckeyeNation27 Goal Goal USA! Staff Member

    while looking for the thread about the half off laptops.....i came across this beauty that was before my time. I am still laughing my ass off. Thank you Clairity :lol:
     
  10. BrutusMaximus

    BrutusMaximus I Heart Boobs

    ROFL. Clarity I love reading your emails.


    Oh on a side note, I talked do their support people a while back, and actually requested an english speaking one, and they transferred me to some place in LA. Was nice.
     
  11. Bucklion

    Bucklion Throwback Staff Member

    "If you see Michael Dell, please kick him in the balls for me."


    GODDAM that's funny!!!!! :lol: I forgot about this...needed a good laugh today.
     
  12. BuckeyeTillIDie

    BuckeyeTillIDie The North Remembers

    "Next time I have a tech question for Dell, I'll be sure to write it on a piece of paper, wipe my ass with that, and then flush it down the toilet. I suspect that will be a much more satisfying and informative experience -- and far less frustrating."


    :slappy: :cheers:
     
  13. OSUsushichic

    OSUsushichic Fired up! Ready to go! Staff Member

    Oh Clarity, thank you for sharing that. You just made my evening! :cheers:
     
  14. Deety

    Deety Ain't nothin' gonna breaka my stride Staff Member

    Classic.

    Definitely need to bump this one every few months.

    :rofl::rofl::rofl:
     
  15. ScarletBlood31

    ScarletBlood31 Buckeye in Blacksburg

    and to think i almost signed off without reading this.....

    this whole email just about ripped my stomach in half from laughing, and this topped it all off....




    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
     

Share This Page