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The 7th Annual 40-40s: Central Ohio's Premiere Malt Liquor Event

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vrbryant

vrbryant

Ever thus to ____ers
Staff member
Where:

2431 North High Street, near the Blue Danube
Columbus, Ohio

When:

Saturday, June 12th 10:00pm

What:

400+ 40oz bottles of malt liquor, including but not limited to King Cobra, Olde English "800", Mickey's, Colt 45, Nighthawk and Steel Reserve

Men
Women
Pomp
Circumstance

___
 
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I can assure you that this year's 40-40s, Central Ohio's Premiere Malt Liquor Event, will be entirely free of Red Bull, as it (a) is not a malt liquor, and (b) does not come in 40oz bottles.
 
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Nope. Open courtyard-type place in between apartment buildings. Very close to (and larger than) last year's venue, which easily accommodated about 80 people, with overflow into nearby areas.
 
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Aren't there always? It's away from view of the street, and we've involved (or gotten the approval of) most, if not all of the nearby residents. Somebody would pretty much have to call the police for them to show up.
 
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I have been corrected on two facts:

(1) There will be precisely six hundred (600) 40oz bottles of malt liquor this year.

(2) They will all be King Cobra (also known as "The Venom", and the Official Malt Liquor of 40-40s).

That is all.
 
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It don't taste like pumpkin pie, no. But 24,000 fluid ounces of any other kind of alcohol would cost a lot more than $800. Besides, it's 40-40s: Central Ohio's Premiere Malt Liquor Event. Ya dig?
 
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I remember my college days when you could get hammered on a couple of 40's of King C, complete with a pack of Camel Lights, and still get enough change from a $5 bill to buy a 32 oz draft at the bar. While I'm reminiscing about KC, I used to swear I was responsible for their move to wide-mouth bottles. After pounding a couple (really, is there any other way to drink it?), I called the customer service number and suggested to them that they come out with wide mouths, since that would make pounding them easier. They responded with a (highly comical when you think about it) "King Cobra advocates drinking responsibly" etc. My comeback was that someone drinking King Cobra isn't really concerned with responsibility, but with efficiency ( 2 x $.99 x 20 minutes = buzz). "King Cobra doesn't condone that" blah blah blah. I thanked them for producing the best sub $1 dollar 40, screw Mt. E and Lazer, and hung up. About a month later, wide mouths out in our area.
 
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