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Yea , verily, all of you are but seeds of my seeds. Of generations upon generations passed are thee begat by me. Not only those of the BP but all nations and yes, of the whole universe.BuckeyeMike80;1736092; said:
The great rivers were an effect of my urination upon the ground. The mountains were but pebbles on a beach.
I command all of you to send me your vbucks in tribute.
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
GOOD TO GET OLD!
Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading toward 70!
1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run -- anywhere.
4. People call at 9 PM and ask, 'Did I wake you?'
5. People no longer view you as a Hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out..
8. You can eat Supper at 4 PM..
9. You can live without sex But not your glasses.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the
room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay
off..
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national
Weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends Because they can't Remember
them either.
18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size.
19. You can't remember who sent you this list..
And you notice these are all in big print for your convenience.
ONE MORE THING:
Never,Under any circumstances, Take a sleeping pill, And a laxative on
The same night!
Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading toward 70!
1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run -- anywhere.
4. People call at 9 PM and ask, 'Did I wake you?'
5. People no longer view you as a Hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out..
8. You can eat Supper at 4 PM..
9. You can live without sex But not your glasses.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the
room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay
off..
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national
Weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends Because they can't Remember
them either.
18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size.
19. You can't remember who sent you this list..
And you notice these are all in big print for your convenience.
ONE MORE THING:
Never,Under any circumstances, Take a sleeping pill, And a laxative on
The same night!
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0
Three old guys were chatting down by the shuffleboard courts in God's Waiting Room.
The first said he was really frustrated because it took him forever to get started when he had to pee.
The second complained that he was completely irregular and had great difficulty ever moving his bowels.
The third chimed in that he urinated every morning at 6:00 AM and moved his bowels at 6:30 AM like clockwork.
"That must be great", said the others.
"Would be," he replied, "Except I don't wake up until 7:00."
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