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Fat Phil's Letter To UT Fans

wadc45

Bourbon, Bow Ties and Baseball Hats
Staff member
BP Recruiting Team
This is the actual email sent to UT fans by Coach Full-of-it after UT's dismal season...

A letter from Tennessee coach Phillip Fulmer to fans


<!-- byline -->November 29, 2005
<!-- /byline -->
Here is the text of an e-mail sent Tuesday to Tennessee fans from coach Phillip Fulmer


Dear Tennessee Fans,

<!-- in content ad --><!-- /in content ad -->I wanted to take a moment to thank you for the great support you give our team. Your passion and pride for our program is what makes us special!

This year was a disappointing season for everyone in the Tennessee family. We started this season with great expectations and failed to live up to those expectations. I assure you that no one is happy about our season — especially me, and I know that our fans deserve better than what we produced this year.

Now that the season is over, I am taking a step back and re-evaluating the entire program. We're doing a lot of things well — especially our defense, but obviously not enough. We grossly underachieved offensively, and special teams were erratic at best. As I've said before, the results this year are unacceptable and accountability starts with me.

My staff and I have great determination to get things back on track. In order to get things turned around, we first have to look at what happened this season. I'm doing a complete audit of everything in our program. No stone will be left unturned and no question left unanswered as to what went wrong.

I've taken some steps already and others are in short order. I have made some coaching changes to move forward. I feel the addition of David Cutcliffe as offensive coordinator is a great step forward for us. He is a great football coach, but better yet he's a leader and teacher. He will challenge our thinking, be creative with our offense and very demanding of our players.

I appreciate the support and patience I've received from the administration and Tennessee fans everywhere to make the adjustments I need to make to get back to where I believe we should be. We have had many great moments, games and seasons together and will again. Tennessee football is about pride, and it's my first priority to restore that pride.

Go Vols!
Phillip Fulmer

He better hope Cutcliffe can help him right the ship in a big hurry...
 
Is Phat Phil Lllloyd's role model when it comes to handling diminished expectations?

Can everyone else, take on the mantle of responsibility, yet suffer no real penalty from your own shortcomings.
 
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Link

Wednesday, 11/30/05
<!--ARTICLE HEADLINE--> Fulmer getting no raise

UT coach agrees with AD's decision

By CHRIS LOW
Staff Writer

<!--ARTICLE BODY TEXT--> KNOXVILLE —Tennessee's Phillip Fulmer, who for the first time in his head coaching career won't receive a raise or contract extension, said yesterday that's the way it should be.
"I didn't expect a raise, and I didn't deserve one with the way things went this season," Fulmer said. "The only thing I asked for was to upgrade our staff, and I appreciate what our administration has done in helping us to do that."
The Vols are coming off their first losing season in 17 years, prompting Fulmer to overhaul his offensive staff. The biggest piece of that overhaul came Monday with the announcement that David Cutcliffe was returning as the offensive coordinator.
Cutcliffe received a two-year deal worth $300,000 annually, which is nearly $140,000 more than his predecessor, Randy Sanders, made last season.
Also, defensive coordinator John Chavis is expected to get a bump up to the $300,000 range after making $252,000 this year.
The Vols' next hire is expected to come from within. Greg Adkins, who's coached tight ends and also served as the recruiting coordinator, has emerged as the strong favorite to get the offensive line job.
Fulmer said when Cutcliffe was hired that Adkins was a candidate for the job. Adkins, who assisted Jimmy Ray Stephens on the offensive line the last three years, also worked with the offensive line at Georgia under Jim Donnan.
Stephens, as well as receivers coach Pat Washington, was not retained for next season. It's the first time in Fulmer's career that he's had to make wholesale changes to his staff.
"I don't think everything is broken," Fulmer said. "But certainly from an offensive standpoint, there needs to be more accountability and more responsiveness."
Fulmer wrote an open letter to fans that was e-mailed yesterday to approximately 38,000 season-ticket holders. He thanked them for their patience and promised improvements in the program.
Fulmer said he and Tennessee Athletics Director Mike Hamilton have already had some discussions and will meet more in detail soon.
"I've had great support from Mike and our administration and appreciate their loyalty, and I can assure you they know where my loyalty lies," said Fulmer, who's been at UT as a player, assistant coach and head coach for 31 years.
Fulmer's raise last year took him to $2.05 million annually. His contract runs through Dec. 31, 2011.
"I view raises and extensions as a reward for meeting and or exceeding expectations, and we didn't do that this year," Hamilton said. "Our commitment now is to support him from a resources standpoint to do what we have to do going forward."
Following the 2002 season, in which the Vols went 8-5 and were routed by Maryland in the Peach Bowl, Fulmer didn't receive a raise. He did, however, receive a one-year extension.
Fulmer is among the highest-paid coaches in the country. Only Oklahoma's Bob Stoops and Texas' Mack Brown made more than him this season.
 
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I like this version better...

http://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/?p=1421

EDSBS EXCLUSIVE!!! FULMER’S APOLOGY LETTER, DRAFT ONE

As most of you know by now, Phil Fulmer–who is very, very fat–is a bit of a gossip. (Know this though: apparently Fulmer only likes giving tips to the NCAA.) He also had a very, very bad year as Tennessee head football coach, prompting him to write an email to fans both apologizing to fans for the down year and promising to re-evaluate the program from the top down.
EDSBS has acquired an early draft of the email, which Fulmer hand wrote himself over a lunch of…well, a lot of things, we suppose, judging from the condition of the letter. The email is revealing: Fulmer not only continues to display his penchant for gossip–censored in red pen by the legal department–but also shows a shocking preference for the jelly donut, not the plain glazed Krispy Kreme that Fulmer-watchers long suspected.


http://static.flickr.com/20/68843009_d2fa0018e3.jpg?v=0
attachment.php


Page 2 of Fulmer’s rough draft. Who knew Fulmer liked Dos Equis?
Dear <STRIKE>ungrateful ingrates</STRIKE> Tennessee Fans,
I wanted to take a moment to thank you for the <STRIKE>making me fire Randy Sanders</STRIKE> great support you give our team. Your <STRIKE>unhealthy, cheez-curl fed obsession</STRIKE> passion and pride for our program is what makes <STRIKE>me</STRIKE> us <STRIKE>lie sleepless with a loaded Glock with no safety under my pillow at night</STRIKE> special!

<STRIKE>By the way–did you know Mike Shula waxes his chest. My wife’s sister’s pastor’s mechanic’s hairdresser says he gets it done once a month along with a trim around the man-bunker. Why would anyone want to go to a school coached by that guy? Just asking–Go Vols!</STRIKE>
This year was a disappointing season for everyone in the Tennessee family. We started this season with great expectations and failed to live up to those expectations, <STRIKE>maybe because I haven’t slept right for years waiting for one of you tubby orange-clad lunatics to pick me off through my window like a ten-point buck for punting on 4th and 2.</STRIKE> I assure you that no one is happy about our season - especially <STRIKE>Randy Sanders, heh heh</STRIKE> me, and I know that our fans deserve better than what we produced this year<STRIKE> which was total horseshit</STRIKE>.
Now that the season is over, I am taking a step back and <STRIKE>FIRING SOME MOTHERFUCKERS</STRIKE> re-evaluating the entire program. <STRIKE>BUT FIRST: DID YOU KNOW THAT JOE KINES HAS TWENTY-THREE BASTARD CHILDREN IN HAITI?</STRIKE> We’re doing a lot of things well - especially our defense, but obviously not enough. We grossly underachieved offensively, and special teams were erratic at best. <STRIKE>I’ve dealt personally with the situation by killing Randy Sanders with my bare hands, and eating him leisurely over the course of three days. Sanders in a Bernaise sauce with a broccolini side was my personal favorite.</STRIKE> As I’ve said before, the results this year are unacceptable and accountability starts with <STRIKE>Randy, who as I said before, I ate from his tasty brains down to his chewy, delicious little toes</STRIKE> me.
My <STRIKE>cabal of slave minions chained to tape machines</STRIKE> staff and I have great determination to get things back on track. In order to get things turned around, we first have to <STRIKE>go to Calhoun’s and eat an entire pig–from the rooter to the tooter. That’s what champions do.</STRIKE> look at what happened this season. I’m doing a complete audit of everything in our program. No stone will be left unturned and no question left unanswered as to what went wrong. <STRIKE>But did you ever ask yourself this question, people: why is Pete Carroll always so happy? Prozac, y’all. Pops ‘em like I pop hush puppies. You wanna play for that guy, recruits? Prince Valium? Plus, I’ll let you in on another secret: everyone in California is gay. Every last one of ‘em. Ever wonder why they parade around in that armor? Gayness, that’s why. Not a single one of ‘em in Knoxville, I tell you what. Go Vols!</STRIKE>
I’ve taken some steps already and others are in short order. <STRIKE>Mmm…short order. Tex, fry me up a midget! Stat! All that Randy-meat’s got me hankering for some long-pig. Hell, I don’t know, see if they’ve got one rotting out on the Body Farm, for all I care. Haven’t you ever heard of aged beef? Same thing, just cheaper.</STRIKE> I have made some coaching changes to move forward. I feel the addition of David Cutcliffe as offensive coordinator is a great step forward for us. He is a great football coach, but better yet he’s a leader and teacher<STRIKE> who couldn’t possibly be as ineffective or tasty as his predecessor.</STRIKE> He will challenge our thinking, be creative with our offense and very demanding of our players.
I appreciate the <STRIKE>constant fucking harassment</STRIKE> support and patience I’ve received from the administration and Tennessee fans everywhere to make the adjustments I need to make to <STRIKE>flee to a third world country where I can live tax free with a 90 pound mistress who doesn’t speak English in anonymity, resting all day on a pile of discarded chicken bones and pineapple husks</STRIKE> get back to where I believe we should be. We have had many great moments, games and seasons together and will again. <STRIKE>Especially once I get out the rumor that Spurrier once threw a ball threw the chest of a second string qb who audibled to a run on first down in a scrimmage. Oh, and you know Ed Orgeron? He ate his offensive coordinator, too, but didn’t stop there–he went on to eat his house, his car, and his boat, and when he was finished, he grunted a shat a bronze statue of Ed eating the guy. You wanna play for that guy? Go Vols! </STRIKE>Tennessee football is about pride, and it’s my first priority to restore that pride.
Go Vols!
Phillip Fulmer
Head Football Coach
NB: Sending this forward for legal to take a look at—you know what happens when I start sending emails around without clearance!







 
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I have my doubts that a letter can qwell the anger towards Fulmer after missing a bowl game with that level of talent. It's a professional thing to do, I guess, but it wouldn't console me very much if I were an alum.
 
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I have my doubts that a letter can qwell the anger towards Fulmer after missing a bowl game with that level of talent. It's a professional thing to do, I guess, but it wouldn't console me very much if I were an alum.

I'll have to ask my fellas in the field in Knox County how hot things are now down there. Last I really checked (before the ND demolition weekend) things were very, very warm - though the alumni were "hanging in there with Coach Fulmer."

I immediately asked if they had ever heard of a group called Blind Faith.

I got a "wha?" in response.
 
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