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A Buckeye Down...

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WoodyWorshiper

WoodyWorshiper

THINK, Before You Speak
Former College Pick'Em Champ
I've been posting around this site and that "other" site for quite a few years, and although I've never met any of you folks in person, it's as though I "know" many of you.

Just got some bad news this weekend that my father was diagnosed with pretty bad lung cancer that has spread into his brain. Kinda up in the air as to whether or not it's in his liver and his shoulder. Tonight I brought him and my mom home from the hospital. It's really a strange feeling seeing this person looking great, in great spirits, knowing what is standing in front of him. He was the person that on November 20, 1971 explained to me who that "crazy" guy was on the sidelines for TOSU against scUM as Coach Hayes was tearing up the yard markers. That day, as a 9 year old kid got me hooked on TOSU football. For the next 15 years we always watched "The Game" together. I'd drive back from Kent State on "Game" day just to watch it with him. "Dad" is 68 years old going on 45. In completely great health up until this incident. No smoke, no drink.

He's the guy that turned me on to TOSU football, and did a good job raising a "SICK" Buckeye fan in me. Any well-wishes would be greatly apreciated.

Peace.
 
though you and i recently had a sharp disagreement with each other, it's certainly not keeping me from sending you my best regards. as i know from experience, witnessing a close family member battle cancer that has metastasized is something that few should have to, but do, experience.

my only brother, who was older, was diagnosed with osteosarcoma, which is a very painful and lethal form of bone cancer. in the three years that he faced this disease, it had spread from his leg to his lungs to his back and to his abdomen. we suspected that when he passed away it was also in his brain, as his right eye had begun to protrude drastically from its orbit. in fact, the day that he passed away he was undergoing localized radiation treatment for the tumors in his back, though this procedure was merely palliative.

to see your healthy and strong 24-year-old brother whither to about half his prior weight in three years was a painful experience to say the least. chad was in such good shape that one day when he was about 20, he decided out of the blue to jog to his friend's house... 14 miles away. i remember that he could also do dumbbell flyes with 70-pound weights. all of that strength and endurance was eaten up by the tumors and the numerous chemotherapy treatments.

though this is by no means advice... i mean, it's arrogant and selfish of me to think that advice is what you want to read and that advice is what you need and that advice is what i'm giving you... well, regardless, i need to state that what i do regret is that i never sat my brother down and expressed to him exactly what it was that he meant to me. to be sure, chad and i were on especially good terms and we knew that we had a healthy relationship, but the goofy boundary that sometimes separates brothers made it difficult for me to forget the awkwardness and express all that i should have. i know that he knows that i loved and love him, but i can't help but think about what telling him these things while he was coherent would have meant for us.

anyway. what i'm getting at is that i hope that you and your father are able to express to each other all the things that are normally awkward to express. men are men, and these important but personal feelings often go unexpressed because we're too afraid to feel vulnerable. part of the reason that i never shared my complete feelings with my brother was because, one, i denied his mortality (older brothers just don't die, right?) and, two, because sharing these feelings, i thought, appeared to be a statement to my brother that i expected him to die. i can't speak for my brother on this last part. i don't know if he would have taken my revelation to him as an expectation that he was definitely going to pass away shortly. what i do know is that it shouldn't matter. these feelings are too important to be left unsaid, regardless of the closeness of my brother or your father to his passing.

again, this is not so much advice as a sharing of my experience. i wish the best for your father, your family, and you. i pray that he is able to live his life--however much he or any of us have, for we're not guaranteed tomorrow--to the fullest and that you and he are able to appreciate it in kind.
 
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WoodyWorshiper;691279; said:
That day, as a 9 year old kid got me hooked on TOSU football. For the next 15 years we always watched "The Game" together.
Click to expand...

Some of my best memories involve my dad and OSU football games. His is the empty chair in the living room when I watch these days. Cherish what you have left, treasure the memory. My thoughts are with you and your dad. Cincibuck
 
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