BuckeyeTrail
Michael Jenkins...does it again!!!
please, just dissappear. go away. i hate you, fox, joe buck, tim mccarver, and bret boone. you are all connected into an irrational ball of hatred for me. sean casey called you a consummate professional. what the hell does consummate mean anyway. i looked up consummate professional in the dictionary and it had a picture of you, aaron boone, sitting at a table with a bunch of other genteel motherfuckers as you discuss how appalled you are at the fact that manny ramirez admires his home runs, while you go out and hit .160 or whatever and are TWICE unable to execute a single sacrifice bunt in the late innings of a close game. the next time he comes up late in a game in an obvious bunting situation, we should just put a pitcher in for him as a pinch-hitter. they can stroll up there, still wearing their jacket, lay down the bunt, and sit their ass back on the bench.
i hate everything about aaron boone. when we signed him last year, i was opposed. i didn't see where we'd put him, and how he was any kind of an upgrade over anyone else we had. the whole allure of the indians was that the team was a bunch of young boys developing and getting good together. if you are going to bring in a veteran, bring in a grizzled (preferably hispanic, because they are the most grizzled) one. what the hell is aaron boone going to teach these guys. how to be a consummate professional? you need a crazy motherfucker like a tony pena or a ivan rodriguez.
i hate the entire boone family. i remembber when bret boone somehow hit like .360 in 2001. then when we played him in the playoffs, he looked just like aaron boone (swinging ridiculously hard on every pitch, his head jerking way to the side, looking like a stupid little kid).
i hate their name. i hate the way it sounds when you say it. i hate how people praise him for being a conssummate professional. i hate how when he blooped that hanging knuckler over the fence to win the pennant, fox glued the camera to his brother, who stood there watching like an idiot. how about showing the winners celebrating, or the pain in the faces of the losers? no, let's show bret boone staring like a consummate professional, because apparently it was really touching that a lousy commentator's brother hit the big home run. there are fat people in beer softball leagues that could have hit the pitch over the fence. wow, he hit a hanging knuckleball that was travelling at 50 mph, let's sign that guy! he's clutch, not to mention, he's a CONSUMMATE PROFESSIONAL!!!
i just know that they all hang out. joe buck, tim mccarver, the boone brothers, and sean casey. talking about how the country has gone to hell in a handbasket, back in the good ole days there were more consummate professionals, now we have that devil-child manny ramirez who has the AUDACITY to somewhat admire a clutch home run.
does anybody have his address? i'm not going to murder him, that would be letting him off too easy. i want to torture the bastard. i want to take a bag of poop, light it on fire, ring his doorbell, then run away laughing like a hyena. when it snows, i want to take a leak on his yard spelling out "aaron boone is a consummate professional...AT SUCKING DICK!!!"
i realize that my post makes little sense, and is probably needlessly vulgar and uncouth and will probably get deleted. but aaron boone is the biggest motherfucker on the entire planet, and just thinking about his stupid face makes me clench my teeth in raging anger. i hate everything about him. it's a toss-up as to who i hate more, him or joe buck. i can see the two of them laughing it up with their wives as they sit in a salarium.
i'll leave this post with a question for the audience: who would you rather punch in the face, aaron boone or joe buck? the answer, for me, is complicated. i would rather punch buck in the face, but it would just be one good punch. boone, on the other hand, i would pummel mercilessly untill all his teeth were knocked out, then i would take a hammer and bash his forehead in.
it's late, and i'm angry. and it's all because of aaron fucking boone.
i want to be reading the sports page tomorrow and see written in the transactions, "The Cleveland Indians have traded Aaron Boone to the New York Yankees for George Steinbrenner's jockstrap"
RGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i hate everything about aaron boone. when we signed him last year, i was opposed. i didn't see where we'd put him, and how he was any kind of an upgrade over anyone else we had. the whole allure of the indians was that the team was a bunch of young boys developing and getting good together. if you are going to bring in a veteran, bring in a grizzled (preferably hispanic, because they are the most grizzled) one. what the hell is aaron boone going to teach these guys. how to be a consummate professional? you need a crazy motherfucker like a tony pena or a ivan rodriguez.
i hate the entire boone family. i remembber when bret boone somehow hit like .360 in 2001. then when we played him in the playoffs, he looked just like aaron boone (swinging ridiculously hard on every pitch, his head jerking way to the side, looking like a stupid little kid).
i hate their name. i hate the way it sounds when you say it. i hate how people praise him for being a conssummate professional. i hate how when he blooped that hanging knuckler over the fence to win the pennant, fox glued the camera to his brother, who stood there watching like an idiot. how about showing the winners celebrating, or the pain in the faces of the losers? no, let's show bret boone staring like a consummate professional, because apparently it was really touching that a lousy commentator's brother hit the big home run. there are fat people in beer softball leagues that could have hit the pitch over the fence. wow, he hit a hanging knuckleball that was travelling at 50 mph, let's sign that guy! he's clutch, not to mention, he's a CONSUMMATE PROFESSIONAL!!!
i just know that they all hang out. joe buck, tim mccarver, the boone brothers, and sean casey. talking about how the country has gone to hell in a handbasket, back in the good ole days there were more consummate professionals, now we have that devil-child manny ramirez who has the AUDACITY to somewhat admire a clutch home run.
does anybody have his address? i'm not going to murder him, that would be letting him off too easy. i want to torture the bastard. i want to take a bag of poop, light it on fire, ring his doorbell, then run away laughing like a hyena. when it snows, i want to take a leak on his yard spelling out "aaron boone is a consummate professional...AT SUCKING DICK!!!"
i realize that my post makes little sense, and is probably needlessly vulgar and uncouth and will probably get deleted. but aaron boone is the biggest motherfucker on the entire planet, and just thinking about his stupid face makes me clench my teeth in raging anger. i hate everything about him. it's a toss-up as to who i hate more, him or joe buck. i can see the two of them laughing it up with their wives as they sit in a salarium.
i'll leave this post with a question for the audience: who would you rather punch in the face, aaron boone or joe buck? the answer, for me, is complicated. i would rather punch buck in the face, but it would just be one good punch. boone, on the other hand, i would pummel mercilessly untill all his teeth were knocked out, then i would take a hammer and bash his forehead in.
it's late, and i'm angry. and it's all because of aaron fucking boone.
i want to be reading the sports page tomorrow and see written in the transactions, "The Cleveland Indians have traded Aaron Boone to the New York Yankees for George Steinbrenner's jockstrap"
RGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!