chimp attack

[Fungo Squiggly]

That's what happens when you don't hail to the chimp.

 

[DaytonBuck]

That's what happens when you don't hail to the chimp.

 

[scarletandgrey]

Why do people continue to think they can keep wild animals as pets? Even if they've raised them since birth.

 

[Bucklion]

That's what happens when you don't hail to the chimp.

 

[Steve19]

Suicide by cop?

 

[Jake]

I would end up beating those fuckin' chimps to death myself if they had come anywhere near me or my balls.

Considering they're about 4-5 times stronger than humans, I'd be betting against you...and your balls.

 

[FrancisSoyer]

I hate monkeys. Always have. That was before I realized how vicious and unpredictable they are. Now, I might buy a Glock .40 based on the off chance one of those bastards escapes Columbus zoo and ends up in my back yard or something. I mean it's not like you're going to win a fist fight with one. Oh yea, in case any chimps are reading this: stop smelling/eating/throwing your shit! It's disgusting!

 

[DaytonBuck]

I hate monkeys. Always have. That was before I realized how vicious and unpredictable they are. Now, I might buy a Glock .40 based on the off chance one of those bastards escapes Columbus zoo and ends up in my back yard or something. I mean it's not like you're going to win a fist fight with one. Oh yea, in case any chimps are reading this: stop smelling/eating/throwing your shit! It's disgusting!

 

[tsteele316]

I hate monkeys. Always have. That was before I realized how vicious and unpredictable they are. Now, I might buy a Glock .40 based on the off chance one of those bastards escapes Columbus zoo and ends up in my back yard or something. I mean it's not like you're going to win a fist fight with one. Oh yea, in case any chimps are reading this: stop smelling/eating/throwing your shit! It's disgusting!

there are no chimps at the columbus zoo.

so if you see some hairy shit throwing mammal in your backyard, it's probably just a michigan cheerleader. so don't shoot it, just give it some snack cakes.

 

[FrancisSoyer]

there are no chimps at the columbus zoo.

so if you see some hairy [censored] throwing mammal in your backyard, it's probably just a michigan cheerleader. so don't shoot it, just give it some snack cakes.

Oh cool. Well I'm still buying a Glock. You can't be too cautious right? The one in the article used a key to get out. Re-read that and let it sink in. I usually don't judge people but I can honestly say if you have a chimp for a pet, your gonna get what you deserve. Go bucks!

Edit: I realize that the person attacked in this story wasn't the owner but it should have been. I stand by my statement :)

 

[DaytonBuck]

Oh cool. Well I'm still buying a Glock. You can't be too cautious right? The one in the article used a key to get out. Re-read that and let it sink in. I usually don't judge people but I can honestly say if you have a chimp for a pet, your gonna get what you deserve. Go bucks!

Columbus Zoo has Bonobos. Still be wary

 

[tsteele316]

Oh cool. Well I'm still buying a Glock. You can't be too cautious right? The one in the article used a key to get out. Re-read that and let it sink in. I usually don't judge people but I can honestly say if you have a chimp for a pet, your gonna get what you deserve. Go bucks!

i have no sympathy for anyone that owns a wild animal as a pet, then the animal subsequently turns on them. and really, don't show the monkey which key unlocks the door. just be happy that none of the chimps in these stories were trained by this guy.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_Z_ZnFDQg4&feature=related]YouTube - Charley The Karate Monkey[/ame]

 

[DaytonBuck]

i have no sympathy for anyone that owns a wild animal as a pet, then the animal subsequently turns on them. and really, don't show the monkey which key unlocks the door. just be happy that none of the chimps in these stories were trained by this guy.

YouTube - Charley The Karate Monkey

That isn't going to end up well

 

[Jake]

I hate monkeys. Always have. That was before I realized how vicious and unpredictable they are. Now, I might buy a Glock .40 based on the off chance one of those bastards escapes Columbus zoo and ends up in my back yard or something. I mean it's not like you're going to win a fist fight with one. Oh yea, in case any chimps are reading this: stop smelling/eating/throwing your shit! It's disgusting!

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6cxNR9ML8k"]YouTube - Lighten Up Francis[/ame]

 

[DaytonBuck]

YouTube - Lighten Up Francis

You give these simian bastards an inch and then you end up with this