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Just a poem for SAB

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SABucksWife

SABucksWife

Senior
I thought I would share this with you guys. I know most of you probably wonder why but it is just my release especially the way I feel about tomorrow. The healing process I thought had begun but little did I know it still hurts like hell!!!!!!!








His laugh still echoes in the depths of my brain;
And when I hear it, it causes me pain.
I miss him so much - mere words cannot say,
How this heartache devours me night and day...
But my memories are strong and time heals grief,
So I dream of the future - and quiet relief.
As I browse through my photos with love and pride,
I know that this sorrow will someday subside,
Leaving happy memories in its place -
Memories of him and his smiling face.
A loving farewell, my dear, adieu.
My heart belongs forever and always to you








an edit sorry




His body lies breathless, in quiet sleep.
We remember his life; we cry and weep.
Life doesn't seem fair, and Death even less,
I don't understand it, I must confess.
We barely exist, in sorrow and pain;
We mourn our loss, we seethe and complain...
But what would he want, if he were alive?
Would he want us to wallow, to merely survive?
Or would he want more? Perhaps our courage -
To reject our grief with its cruel bondage!
Let's honor him now and look forward - with hope,
Remembering his life and learning to cope,
With loss as a tool to sculpt our goals -
Not as an anchor that burdens our souls.
Celebrate his life - reminisce with a grin!
Then Death will lose - and he will win!
 
Last edited:
SABucksWife said:
I thought I would share this with you guys. I know most of you probably wonder why but it is just my release especially the way I feel about tomorrow. The healing process I thought had begun but little did I know it still hurts like hell!!!!!!!








His laugh still echoes in the depths of my brain;
And when I hear it, it causes me pain.
I miss him so much - mere words cannot say,
How this heartache devours me night and day...
But my memories are strong and time heals grief,
So I dream of the future - and quiet relief.
As I browse through my photos with love and pride,
I know that this sorrow will someday subside,
Leaving happy memories in its place -
Memories of him and his smiling face.
A loving farewell, my dear, adieu.
My heart belongs forever and always to you
Click to expand...
Definitely a GPA!!!
 
Upvote 0
Happy Holiday wishes to you and yours, SABwife, in a time that is the hardest for those left behind. When you think you just can't take it, you can always come here and we will welcome you with open arms. Keep smiles on your children's faces this season, and you will have made him proud. I hope you get a chance to share this season with his family, and allow yourselves to love, as well as grieve, the man you have lost this year. *hug*
 
Upvote 0
OCBuckWife;1339756; said:
Happy Holiday wishes to you and yours, SABwife, in a time that is the hardest for those left behind. When you think you just can't take it, you can always come here and we will welcome you with open arms. Keep smiles on your children's faces this season, and you will have made him proud. I hope you get a chance to share this season with his family, and allow yourselves to love, as well as grieve, the man you have lost this year. *hug*
Click to expand...



Ty for the kind words I do plan on making this year no diffrent than the rest. I am surrounded by people who love us and who love Mark and I know by the grace of god we will make it through the next coupke of weeks in high spirits because it is the only way. To rejoice in the gifts that god presents us with daily.
 
Upvote 0
Happy Thaanksgiving to all of you guys may you be blessed with the love of your family and closest friends. May you be surround by the ones you are most Thankful for...pray for the ones we have lost and those less fortunate. Pray for our men and women at war for our freedom may god keep them safe...


Take time to think of all that god has blessed you with and give him Thanks and Praise
 
Upvote 0
SABucksWife;1339718; said:
I thought I would share this with you guys. I know most of you probably wonder why but it is just my release especially the way I feel about tomorrow. The healing process I thought had begun but little did I know it still hurts like hell!!!!!!!








His laugh still echoes in the depths of my brain;
And when I hear it, it causes me pain.
I miss him so much - mere words cannot say,
How this heartache devours me night and day...
But my memories are strong and time heals grief,
So I dream of the future - and quiet relief.
As I browse through my photos with love and pride,
I know that this sorrow will someday subside,
Leaving happy memories in its place -
Memories of him and his smiling face.
A loving farewell, my dear, adieu.
My heart belongs forever and always to you



His body lies breathless, in quiet sleep.
We remember his life; we cry and weep.
Life doesn't seem fair, and Death even less,
I don't understand it, I must confess.
We barely exist, in sorrow and pain;
We mourn our loss, we seethe and complain...
But what would he want, if he were alive?
Would he want us to wallow, to merely survive?
Or would he want more? Perhaps our courage -
To reject our grief with its cruel bondage!
Let's honor him now and look forward - with hope,
Remembering his life and learning to cope,
With loss as a tool to sculpt our goals -
Not as an anchor that burdens our souls.
Celebrate his life - reminisce with a grin!
Then Death will lose - and he will win!
Click to expand...
GPA indeed! Hope you had a nice Thanksgiving.
 
Upvote 0
3 months and I am still survinving

Into my memory
As if for some unforeseen self imposed destiny
Over which I hold no power
I dream of time where I cannot control my movements
By the minutes of the hour
And in the fantasy where nothing is quite real
It is not quite unreal neither
I drift though this silent world
With an uncaring kind of awareness
But in this drifting I seem to receive so little
And give up even less
Faces pass across the celluloid of my mind
As if it
were a silken screen
And having recognised each one
They pass on to all intents unseen
Familiar images fill such unexpected roles
The appear to be enjoined
And they throw me off the weirdest tracks
On which my dreams have powers
To bring to life the dead
While through the slumber those deceased
Can say all that was unsaid
A dream is a place where the unattainable
Can always be attained
For where although nothing Is ever lost
Nothing is ever gained
With adventures that were never real
They will still be part of me
And so when daylight causes me to wake
Dreams fade into my memory
 
Upvote 0
A poem my daughter wrote for Mark

A special dad is hard to find,
You dad I'm keeping in my mind,
I wished you could have stayed forever,
But I will never forget you oh not ever.

If dreams weren't dreams and dreams came true,
I wouldn't be here I'd be with you.
Distance is one thing that keeps us apart,
But dad you will always remaine in my heart.

A special smile, a special face, a special someone I can't replace,
I love you and I always will,
You filled a space that no one will ever replace.
 
Upvote 0
Just another one of my releasing moments...His Bday is coming up and I miss him so much mine is tomorrow and his is Friday and its not the same we use to celebrate it together and this year I will pass it alone both days :(






The tears fall like rain from my eyes
I close them, my head is flooded with more pain
The cracked reflections are still there

The breeze blows through the trees,
like the feelings pass through my soul

I am so unsure
how to breathe
how to feel
how to move

How do I find my soul again
How do I carry on without the one I love
How do I live not knowing the reason

Why was I broken before
How did I become healed
When did I find meaning
Why am I broken again

Music envelopes my ears
reminding me
music is muffled by my heart
all I can hear is his voice

Clinching the pillow
Curled up tight
sobbing, screaming from within
all I can desire is to feel his touch

I must pull myself up
I must believe I can go on
I must understand it will get better
somehow
someway
someday
 
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I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying, You found it hard to sleep.

I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."

I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour coffee you see,
You were thinking of the many times, your hands reached out to me.

I was with you at the shops today, Your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.

I was with you at my grave today, You tend it with such care.
I want to reassure you, that I'm not lying there.

I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said "It's me."

You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.

It's possible for me, to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty, "I never went away."

You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew ...
in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.

The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning and say
"Goodnight, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."

And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.

I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out ... then come home to be with me
 
Upvote 0
I know some of you may be tired of my releasing moments here about Mark, I just have noone else to share them with at this point in time. Last night for the first time since he passed I dreamt him. I was so excited I woke up and quickly fell back to sleep to continue the dream and thankfully I was able to. This morning I wrote down everything I remembered him saying to me and turned it into a poem . My heart is so content right now. I got to see my baby, and I didnt even cry. Here is what I wrote down





As I gently journey forward
across this wonderous land,
beautiful angels bless my days
and dear loved ones hold my hand.

There are the most beautiful scenes here
the landscape is so pure and bright,
there are the most beautiful flowers
and the most beautiful, shining, radiant light.

If ever you should feel lonesome
just call my name and i will draw near,
I never will abandon you
the special love I have for you is right here.

Just one thought sent from you
I'll hear your call and I'll be right there,
waiting closely in the wings
because i truly care.

The treasured memories within our hearts
could never fade away,
a blessed .. beautiful deep true love
perfectly carved in every way.

Just because I went back home
doesn't mean the love i have for you is gone,
It's our love that truly connects us still
my love for you is real and still lives on.

No one can ever take away
the special love we two have built,
It was my time to journey on
don't feel sadness, nor suffer guilt.

when you have a cup say "cheers"
I'll happily raise my cup,
and if your sad... I'll be right there
to help to pick you up.

When you're sitting in the garden
I'll be there to share your day,
I'll be around you when I can
to keep those sad thoughts and tears at bay.

Live your life to the full
don't miss out and have some fun,
your pathway took a different turn
my new life has just begun.

I'm laying out the foundations here
and when the beautiful gates open wide,
I'll be right there to take your hand my love
together we'll walk inside.
 
Upvote 0
I remember you today my love and miss you oh so much I said a prayer for you and all the men and women who have and are still serving this great country I love you and miss you!



It doesnt really matter
Why nor how nor when.
Its just never ever easy
To lose your very best friend.
You did so much together.
You shared ideas too.
Now time alone is so very hard
For both family and you.
Music gets you thinking
About so many past events.
The places that you went to
And all the times you spent.
The future looks so scary.
How will it be alone?
What will happen to you
When your futures so unknown?
Just remember that this person
No longer by your side
Would never want you miserable
You know it just cant be denied.
So give yourself the privilege
Of some time and space.
Be patient and caring about yourself.
Take all you can embrace.
Memories will be there.
Their love never goes away.
Life is just now different.
 
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