Post Lines to ruin a first date

[BB73]

"You look just like Paris Hilton. She was the best lay I ever had."

 

[Gobucki]

I'm a little stuffed up, does this rag smell like chlorophorm?

 

[cincibuck]

"Why don't you come over to my place? I can't go anywhere with this tracker bracelet."

"Boy, first date since I got out of the big house (slammer, stir, lock up, prison)"

"We can catch the 5 o'clock Mass at St. Mary's and then head out..."

 

[3yardsandacloud]

"Louis here ... "

 

[Gobucki]

Oh, say, if my parole officer calls, we had a date on Sunday night, too, okay?

 

[GoBucks89]

"Did you hear they're going to make a new Star Trek movie?"

 

[Jagdaddy]

Her: "Why did you ask me out?"

Him: "I like my women biscuit thick."

 

[hoat]

Wanna rassle?

 

[Gobucki]

"I finally have enough money to have my penis turned into a vagina, so yeah thats good news."

 

[stxbuck]

Is it OK if my life coach comes with us....

My posse is going to want a turn after we're done getin' freaky.....

I hope you're a better lay than your sister/roommate/mom......

 

[BB73]

This really won't be about sex. I don't need women for that - I'm one of the lucky males that's able to fellate himself.

 

[Buck Nasty]

Wow, you are a lot fatter than I remember from the bar. I must have been really drunk.


Sorry I can't do Friday, I am grounded. How about Saturday.


Hi, how are you? This is my mom.

Hey, hop in. I just need to drop off these last few pizza's and then I will be off work.

I am going to have to ask you that for the rest of the evening you end every statement with a hearty "Haaaarrrrrrr!!"

 

[Gobucki]

"I've loved you since I first started following you home from work."

 

[buckeyeboy]

My friends and I are huge gamers.

 

[LoKyBuckeye]

"if I pay for dinner you have to subscribe to my web site for just $49.95... it's normally $77"